Bears 365

32 Reasons to Hate the NCAA

2010-04-02T12:40:00.000-07:00

Expanding the near-perfect 64 team NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament is truly "Madness." Nothing but pure greed is driving this inevitable change, and it will kill a beloved national sports happening. An expansion to 96 teams will further dilute an already diluted college talent pool and allow more unqualified teams, teams with 5-11 conference records a shot at advancement. It will make the regular season and conference tournaments meaningless. I can't believe that the NCAA would even consider placing it's incompetent finger on the best thing it has left. Yet, here they are doing just that, and the consensus is that it is going to pass. If this expansion happens, then I am going to take a pass.

This is not an unprecedented move for me. In 1994, baseball went on on strike, losing the last part of the season as well as the World Series. That year, my White Sox had a very good team with Frank Thomas having an MVP year and a superb pitching staff. I wanted to see that club in the playoffs as much as anything that I ever wanted as a fan. Baseball has never been the same for me. I was happy for the Sox 2005 World Series win, for the fans, but I really felt dead inside about the victory.

As I mentioned before, if the NFL locks out players in 2011, it will have the same effect. I will emotionally walk away. As I have gotten older, the entertainment view toward sports has drained much of my sports energy and fanaticism. I don't think kids hold the same passions for sports as my generation did. The reason for that is the money. When money drives your decision making, the passion and emotion always falls victim.

Money. That is all tournament expansion is all about. This change will place critical and exciting early-round games on Tuesday and Wednesday. This is too much for the fan to take. You can justify a couple early Thursdays and Fridays for hoops, but you can't blow off a whole week. Give me one good reason why the 64 team tourney is not perfect, and I will take it all back. At 96 teams, nobody is arguing on Selection Sunday that the 15-16 Northern Illinois Huskies should be taken over the 12-18 DePaul Blue Demons. Who cares? The issue of the bubble teams goes out the window, and that argument makes Selection Sunday worth following. So, in my opinion, the only so-called negative, the "Bubble Teams" is truly a positive. You have to earn it. At 96 teams, you have to just be breathing.

I'm Back

2010-03-19T08:37:00.000-07:00

It was quite a year. I don't recall if the Bears actually played the 2009 season. I have blocked it out of my memory. If you could picture my facial expression right now, it would be the "Lovie staring at the Jumbotron look while fondling the red challenge flag in his pocket during the game" face. What? We signed Jay Cutler? Who wrote that last blog entry in April of 2009?

I was mercifully on trial for the majority of the football season. I would rather remember a death penalty hearing Marathon than that ugly display of my favorite obsession. It reminds me of John McKay's answer to the question posed to him regarding his woeful 1970's Tampa Bay Buccaneers. McKay was asked,"How do you feel about your team's execution?" McKay's response was "I'm in favor of it." Classic.

So, we are stuck with another season of Loving our staff. We coughed up some profit for several free agents. I am holding off on any predictions of greatness. Let's see what happens after they start cashing the checks. I am supporting the removal of Greg Olsen from this roster. He still hasn't hit anyone. He should be perfect as a Blackhawk defenseman. The downside of Olsen's departure...Cutler will have to find someone else's wife to hit on.

I am not a Blackhawk goalie-hater. Could they be better? Sure. But you cannot blame the goaltending for the lack of character by the skaters in front of him. Since the Olympic break, this team cannot finish against the good teams. You got to get mentally tough for the NHL playoffs. So, let's get to gettin'.

Lots to look forward to. The Brian Kelly era at ND. The NCAA tournament-"Sure the teams are shitty-But who doesn't love 15 overtime games in the first round!" "ON CBS!!!" Ozzie Guillen. The NHL playoffs. The Lovie Farewell Tour. 9-7 and no playoffs. Then a lockout; Killing the Golden Goose. Then I write off the NFL for life. 2010. Tremendously Tremendous.

Riding With the King.

2009-04-05T11:20:00.000-07:00

On April 1st, 2009, I clicked a "Send Payment" prompt on my computer and shot another $1000-plus into the shitter. At least, that's how I felt at the time. The Bears would take my money and bury it in the ground along with my Super Bowl dreams for the next decade.

A day later, I was celebrating my wise and thoughtful waste of money. The Bears landed a potential franchise quarterback and gave up alot of frustration and heartache to get him. This is a glorious new day for the Bear Nation. There is no downside to this deal at all. First and foremost, it has excited me in a wholly immature and pointless way. For that, I love Jerry Angelo. An adult man should get such joy from his children or accomplishing something truly significant, like funding a scholarship for a truly needy person. Not me. I am on cloud nine over a 25 year-old man with a cannon for an arm, a stupid sneer-smirk provided by his "Frank Burns" lipless mouth and a losing record as a starter. I am a pathetic human being.

Self-flaggelation aside, let me tell you how to enjoy this ride. Jay Cutler is first-round QB with three seasons of NFL experience under his belt. He has started for two of those years. His third and most important year of development, he was selected to the Pro Bowl. HOW COULD THIS BE CONSIDERED ANYTHING BUT AWESOME? Who cares if it doesn't work out in the end? I can't wait to see what happens. Any football man would call this a very good situation. If they don't, they are lying, jealous or both. As a Bear fan, I never thought I would see the day.

As for what they gave up, good riddance. Of course, I will miss overpaying for another medicore/awful first-round college rookie. I get two years sabbatical. I really like Kyle Orton, I do. But he would just represent the frustration of watching another impotent offensive season. It was never Orton's fault, but the QB position has been the bane of every Bear fans existence. No longer settling for above-average, we are taking a shot at the title. It is a gamble for sure, but gambling is fun. Once and a while. For a Bear fan, it had been "never."

This doesn't solve the pile of problems that this team has. I am not calling this guy our savior. It is something new, shiny and smells good. No time to be cynical. Like the pyramids, I just get to see something I have never seen before. Cross it off the list.

The Heat is ON! Matt Likes It.

2009-02-24T11:15:00.000-08:00

Thanks for nothing, boss.
Lovie Smith would never say so, but you had to wonder if that's what he thought over the weekend after hearing general manager Jerry Angelo's plans to tweak rather than transform the Bears' roster. Knowingly or not, Angelo turned up the heat a notch on Smith by identifying coaching and attitude as the biggest reasons for optimism heading into 2009.

Don't expect any quick-fix, big-ticket free agent signings, Angelo said. Don't count on the NFL draft for an instant cure. Don't hold your breath waiting for that blockbuster trade either.

But by all means, do trust the Bears' coaches to improve the attitude—and thus the record.
Dave Haugh-Chicago Tribune

This is an excerpt from Haugh's article on Jerry Angelo's State of the Bears address at the 2009 Scouting Combine. Ultimately, Haugh concludes that "coaching up what we got" is not enough; the Bears need better players. I agree. However, what Angelo says here is something that has needed to be said for years. I have been screaming it for years. These guys can't coach, and when we find one that can coach (Ron Rivera), Lovie gets rid of them. The Bears have to develop the players on their roster. It cannot solely fall on the general manager alone, picking talent. We are not getting enough production on first through third down from the bottom of the roster. Depth is key to championship teams, and somehow the Bears cannot get quality snaps out of their reserve players. Lovie is on the spot this year. The team must improve, or he is gone. I feel a new head coach is in our future. Nice.

However, Angelo is not off the hook. Although free agency is drying up, this year's draft is key. We have to get four starters out of this pool. It can be done, and Angelo should feel the same pressure to perform that he has put on Lovie.

I will blame Angelo for this. Headlines read: "The re-signing of John St.Clair has become the number one priority in free agency." Come again? If you saw the recent picture in the Trib of St.Clair in t-shirt and shorts, you would understand why I am jamming a sharpened pencil into my thigh. (Thankfully, he is clothed in the above photo. That's about to be a sack, by the way. The photographer caught his subject in his natural position--smoked off the edge). John Tait's retirement was not anticipated and caught Angelo off-guard. Now, the weakness in the O-line is completely exposed, even to a five-year-old. The Bears have neglected to inject some youth into this position for years, notwithstanding the first round pick then lost rookie season of OT Chris Williams. Now, they have to give this load, St.Clair, a big raise, switch him to right tackle so we can watch defenders run over our QB from the front side instead of the blind side. Nice work. I find a revolving door to be a more efficient blocker than St."E"Clair.

I am watching the Combine, and I have to tell you, if the Bears didn't have such gaping holes elsewhere, I would love to get one of these linebackers in the blue and orange. What a group. Three of these bastards are from USC. How is it possible that they lost to Oregon State, blowing their shot at a national title? The experts always talk about "bend" "hip turn" and "sinking into your weight." I had no idea what in the hell they were talking about. Then I watched Aaron Curry, Brian Cushing and Clay Matthews work out. Now I get it. They are something to see without pads, and they are even better with pads. You can see the explosiveness in their movements. Alas, we instead need to help out John St.Clair and the gang of "receivers-who-can't-get-open."

All You Really Need is Heart.

2009-01-12T19:52:00.000-08:00

"We had a great team when I was in Chicago," he said. "I loved, loved, loved my teammates in Chicago, but something was missing. Maybe we were just a little too cool in Chicago. Or we just didn't give it our hearts and soul. Whereas here with Ray Lewis being that emotional leader and as spiritual as he is takes us over the top with that emotional advantage we have over the other team on Sundays. "-Brendan Ayanbadejo

I have said repeatedly that the Bears have major issues with their scheme and talent evaluation. These are still major problems. However, the above cited quote from this Pro Bowl ex-Bear confirms my suspicions regarding the biggest problem on this team- their heart. I never get the feeling that this group of Bears actually loves playing football. I don't see the inspired play. I don't mean that you need to see them jumping up and down, yelling and screaming. You can see the joy and inspiration in every play, every snap. The Bears have no player that inspires, no player that sets the bar high and no player to hold the others accountable on every play. Not just every game, but every play.

A player like Ray Lewis. Lewis dances, yells, jumps around before the game. One may think that such antics are unnecessary in the pro game. Think again. Great football is not played for the money. Great football is played for wins and championships. Lewis, despite the antics, plays every play with all of his heart and soul. You can see it on Sundays. Lewis's antics may invoke chuckles and disdain. It is who he is. More importantly are his actions on the field, when the ball is snapped. Ray Lewis inspires his team to greatness. He demands the same level of effort and commitment that he displays. He will never be forgotten when the history of the game is written. This is a fact, and it cannot be disputed.

The Bears have no such player. My attorney, Bill Stanton, pointed out that the last time he has seen true inspired leadership in a Bear jersey was Brian Urlacher's greatest game, the come-from-behind win at Arizona in 2005. He's right. That was a Ray Lewis-like performance. Urlacher decided to take over the game and willed his team to victory. Great football is like the definition of pornography, "You know it when you see it." Name me another similar performance by a Bear player in the past two seasons. You can't. The Ravens get one every week.

The Bear players probably feel that it is too "college" to act all rah-rah. As Brendan says, "we were too cool." They probably laugh at Ray Lewis' dance moves or blow off the phenomenon that is Tim Tebow. They act funny. Similarly, I didn't want to like Tebow at first. All Christian and fist-pumps, he was made out to be a football God before putting on a Florida Gator helmet. Now, I am one who believes that Tebow has a chance to be the "Greatest College Football Player in History." He has won me over. From putting his team on his back after an early season-"bad loss" to Ole Miss, to his bloody pep talks to his teammates, to being the grand marshal of the Gator parade to the national championship, Tebow motivates those talented yet cynical young men to greater heights. Tebow is a Geek God of football. I have played with guys like that and would love to have played with Tebow. When players like Lewis and Tebow are on your team, it seems like you win more games than you lose. Now that's the funny thing.

"Decision 2009-Mediocrity"

2009-01-10T12:39:00.000-08:00

At least Lovie Smith and Jerry Angelo are men of their word. They told us that we didn't need many changes and, by God, they ain't changin'. Their actions or lack thereof, demonstrate their convictions. Let's fire the position coaches to properly place the blame on those responsible for our jello-like defense. That's the kind of accountability strong organizations display, like a group of 10 year-olds standing around Mom's broken Waterford vase. Thankfully, we have not seen this type of leadership from the White House, yet. Only from Halas Hall and Springfield.

There are real teams playing this weekend. I will be watching the tough and physical Ravens, Titans, Steelers and Panthers, trying not to sob uncontrollably. I love playoff football, and many of this year's contenders have all the trappings of a Matt McQuaid team. Run hard and hit hard, solid fundamentals, you know, the stuff I don't see in orange and blue.

Lots of opportunuty to get better "right now" in this year's draft. I will be going over my draft board and make my picks soon. Underclassmen have to decide by the 15th of January. My reader needs to stay posted.

I am putting my name into the hopper to be chosen as the Special Prosecutor in the Blago impeachment hearings. It would be like shooting a fish in a barrell. The Illinois Senate is a "hanging jury."

I'm in Wonderland.

2008-12-29T16:14:00.000-08:00

"When you're 9-7, you're close," Smith said. "You don't need an overhaul. You just need to add a few pieces to the puzzle."-Lovie Smith

There is this scene in "Saving Private Ryan" that so disturbed me that I promised never to watch the movie again. Toward the climactic ending, Pvt. Mellish, played by Adam Goldberg, was in a tower. He was tackled by a large Nazi, who took a knife and plunged it into Mellish's abdomen. As he killed Mellish, he held him close and softly "shushed" him like one would do to a baby. It makes me ill just recounting this scene. A stabbing is such an up close and personal method of killing. Add to that the Nazi's complete ease in destroying a human life, well, it doesn't get more real than that. Too real.

When I read the above quote, Pvt. Mellish came to mind. This is the only way I can express the onslaught of emotion that hit me. I want to cradle my coach in my arms and end it. How else to deal with this infuriating man? Can he truly be serious? Even the casual fan who knows nothing about pro football knows that Smith is dead wrong in this analysis. I should have been better prepared; I did predict this. Just didn't think he would say it so soon.

The Bears are closer to 3-13 than 13-3. Close? Does he watch film or only the Jumbotron during games? I have watched the Jumbotron at the games and I can tell you, the Bears don't look better on replay. This is a nightmare. I love the Bears with a passion that crosses the line of sensible, adult behavior. I don't know what to do. I need more time. I feel despair. My team has been taken over by aliens.

Somebody has to do something. This town loves the Bears. All we want is to win. Why don't the owners, management and coaches want the same thing? This question is always on my mind. Sure, they talk winning. As they say, talk is cheap. Their actions don't back it up. I hate them all for making me feel this way. They have got to be stopped. Lovie's "puzzle" is like the outdoor maze in The Shining , and I'm Jack. I have got his look on my face right now. Right now.

Playoffs Avoided.

2008-12-28T16:14:00.000-08:00

They had to win. They couldn't do it. Beaten, in the end, by a more talented team. The moments that summed it up: Losing the best receiver in the NFL in a coverage mistake, and a stop the defense had to have.

The mistake. Daniel Manning has made that mental mistake before. More than once. It was the reason he was not the starting free safety. We had found a use for Manning in the past four weeks. He had been successful, a difference-maker. They must have forgot about his inability to react properly in pass coverage. They had Steltz take all of the practice reps at free safety. Apparently, they still remembered Manning's mistakes right up until 11:00 a.m. when they made Daniel the surprise starter.

In the end, they had it down to seven, and they needed the ball back. Couldn't get the Texans off of the field. Couldn't stop the run-9 carries for 70 yards on the drive. Story of this defense, this season.

There I was, riveted to the TV, hoping against my own angst, that they would win this game. It meant something, if just for this day and this game. Problem is that the Bears did not feel the same way. Maybe some did but not all. People will talk about the lull in the offense after the ten-point lead. That lull is called "ADJUSTMENT." The opposing coaches adjust, and the offense stalls. The key is to re-adjust. The Bears have shown the inability to change for two seasons.

I am interested to see Kyle Orton throw to some professional receivers. I think he is pretty good. The Cover-2 is over. See Tampa Bay's last four games.

This loss does hurt. Not as much pain as the Cowboy fans must be feeling. That makes me feel better. The Jets and the Cowboys spent money like Arab sheiks this past off-season. You can't build a winner with too many free agents. Or a meddling owner. Two things that will never happen in Chicago. I'm pulling for the Falcons. Has Farve retired yet?

It has been a rough year. Up and down. Hoping that this team could put a whole team effort together. I am watching Eagle safety Brian Dawkins talking about what he was playing for this Sunday knowing they have a shot at the playoffs. He said, "We played for each other; we wanted to win this game for the guys in the locker room. We may have had a chance to get in the playoffs, but it really did not matter. We wanted to beat the Cowboys and let whatever happens, happen." That's football. Love it.

Mike Singletary got the head coaching job in San Francisco. Won 4 or his 5 games as coach. A guarantee: Singletary will win in this league. He will win alot. He is a proud man not burdened by pride. Love him.

Until draft day, go Hawks, go Flyin' Illini.

What Doesn't Kill You Only Makes You Delude Yourself Into Thinking You Can Win a Playoff Game.

2008-12-23T09:43:00.000-08:00

I confess that I was hoping that Mason Crosby was going to make that kick and end this charade of a "playoff" season. I don't feel guilty about it. Lovie Smith must be Irish or have a horseshoe up his ass, because I have not seen such luck. Does he ever say anything into those headphones? It should say "Fisher Price" not "Motorola" on those things.

No playoffs, OK? If you can't compete for a Super Bowl VICTORY, why burden your fanbase with false hope. I mean, 10-6, for this team? It is not right. I know that I am very negative, but I know this program. They will not improve the talent-level in a meaningful way. These ten wins will somehow enable them to coast through the off-season. They are delusional; you know this is true. Two years from a Super Bowl appearence, and they roll out this receiving crew? And I'm the crazy one. Scheme changes and talent are needed here, stat. IV with ringers-let's get em to Rampart. Where is Randolph Mantooth and why didn't he have a movie career? Foreshadowing for David Caruso. What was I talking about?

Enough of the "light is going on for Devin Hester" as a receiver comments. He let a TD pass right through the old paws, again. Plus, Orton can't hit him on those Superfly routes. What is the point? When pressed hard by the experienced and talented Packer corners, Hester could not get off the line, get into his routes and get open. He is a number 3; a taller Antwaan Randle-El. No more.

The only man out there this year is Lance Briggs. He has been very good all season. And at cost.

You know you have a bad organization when not only can't you evaluate your own talent, you can't even evaluate the playing surface. This is the Fucking NFL. Play should not be affected by slipping on a crappy field. How can this go on? Put in the field-turf and let the best players in the world settle it the right way. I am so pissed about this field. It is the height of "bush" league.

All right, I will get positive. Daniel Manning has been a difference-maker in the last 3 games. He has found a niche. You have to cherrypick the good stuff, but it is there. Alex Brown, Matt Forte, solid performers. Finally, the geniuses up in the booth, they that Lovie is not talking to, finally decide that getting the ball to Greg Olsen is a priority. Kinda the reason you dopes drafted him. It won them a ball game.

Not sold on Orton as the answer. I have seen enough to keep him and keep playing him. Not enough consistency to lift the manhole cover off the offensive player checkbook.

Craig Steltz is a rookie, and I like him. But if that missed tackle doesn't cause him to jerk awake at night in a cold sweat like Nick Nolte in "North Dallas Forty" then I don't want him. That's "falling on your face in Chicago" Right, Phil? National TV no less.

Kornheiser was good last night. At the end of the half, as the Bears were pissing down their legs, he asked "why aren't they booing louder. Jaws, am I right?" He was right. However, Tony needs to understand some things. A. People were as frozen as Lovie's 1,000 yard stare at the Jumbotron. B. So were the beers. C. They were waiting for the half to end, as Jaworski told him. And as they left the field, they got it. He also said that the Bear fans have been getting psyched for the defense for the past 50 years. This is also true. We are so used to incompetent offense, we don't bother vocalizing; falls on deaf ears. Remember the first 6 games of 2005? The Grossman month? We were scoring so much, people were disrobing in the stands. It was anarchy. Bear fans couldn't survive a whole season of good offense. We have sausage stuck in our aortas, the "Chicago heart" beats tenuously.

Oh, Robbie Gould. MVP. The kicker. The horror.

Please Bears, just die already, in Houston. Don't empower the evil silent genius.

Looking Forward to Many Bears Accidently Shooting Themselves in the Thigh

2008-12-02T20:20:00.000-08:00

It is tough to sit in front of this computer to write about the Bears. For the first time all season, I shut off the game with time on the clock. Two huge road games in the division, the latter, if won, would have given the Bears the full length lead for a division crown. The results...two gutless performances. With a chance to prove to this fan that the Bear players and coaches were up to being a formidable playoff opponent, they came up lame. They shoot horses, why not Bears.

There is no intensity or toughness in this group. The decision-making is suspect from the top on down. In the end, they are an 8-8 team, inconsistent, like I had mentioned earlier in the year. I get caught up, ride the ups too long and allow the dips to depress me too much. I didn't trust my own instincts. It's my fault. Mine and Lovie's.

If you love pro football, watch the Giants. They are doing everything right, including their handling of the Plaxico situation. Bottom line, they proved that they can have a successful passing game without him. Good times.

Looks like Charlie Weis is back for another year. I would suggest some humble pie but the punchline is too easy. As bad as ND's talent base was when Weis's third year began, he should get a chance to coach his recruits. The problem is that I don't think he can do it. Sucks to start over. And Lou Holtz can shut the fuck up. I think Lou is a genius and knows how to build a winner. But when he took the job, he got assurances that his recruits would get accepted. And they did. He won a national championship and came a phantom holding call away from a second title with a partial (Prop 48) qualifier at QB, Tony Rice. Rice ran Holtz's veer better than any QB he ever coached. In the end, Lou won too much, and the priests pulled the rug out from under him. Dr. Lou got the hell out. So, it ain't easier to win now for Charlie than it was for Holtz. He is lying out of his ass. He is a genius at that as well.

My Bears playoff ticket invoice went right into the shredder. The sad part, they could still win the division. I won't be there to see it. I have learned my lesson. I refuse to watch Kevin Payne again. If he knocks another teammate off a tackle with his ridiculous tackling technique (think of a scud missile wearing a navy blue #44 jersey-inaccurate and sometimes a dud), I may swallow my own tongue. Oh, and one more suggestion, it might not serve you well to call three inside running plays into the two best run-stuffing D-tackles in the league. Not good times. But I'm not still bitter.

Oh yeah, Peanut, when they ask you what happened on your junior varsity attempt at covering Bernard Berrian, your answer should be, "I screwed up." Your answer that "I was going through my progressions, well, I just don't know what happened" was really compelling. It looked like a Bassmaster fisherman hooked you with a double-squiggly spinner bait and pulled your head forward toward the WRONG RECEIVER. After Berrian went the distance, Lovie asked Tillman "Charles, why did Bernard Berrian go 99 YARDS for a touchdown?" Tillman replied, "Coach, that was all he needed."

Tillman didn't really say that. Actually, it was Ohio Stae assistant coach, Lou Holtz to Woody Hayes after USC Trojan O.J. Simpson went 95 yards for a touchdown. True Story. One of the few you will get out of Lou.

Tommie Harris is Misunderstood Again

2008-11-15T07:25:00.000-08:00

Mike Lombardi of the National Football Post commenting on Brad Biggs Sun-Times article:
No one takes exception to the work of the media more regularly than defensive tackle Tommie Harris, who complained at length about a Sun-Times column from earlier in the week that he acknowledged he didn’t read. Harris said the column made it appear he was pointing fingers at teammates after the loss to Tennessee. ‘ You think that a lot of the fans are saying a lot of negative stuff, but it’s really just the media that always keeps us going,” Harris said. ”That’s what you guys have to do, that’s your job. … I just pray for you guys and hope that you can sleep at night.” Cornerback Corey Graham said Wednesday that everyone with the Bears was on thin ice, and that seems to be the way some want it. ”Where is it not tense Week [11]?” Smith said. ”It’s a big game, and each week it’s that way. I hope it would be tense. There’s a lot at stake, and guys want to play well. It will be the same thing next week and the week after that.”

Mike says: Tommie Harris is just too inconsistent as a player. He looked back to form about a month ago, and now he is back to lying on blocks and does not have the ability to disrupt many plays. He is not quick off the ball, he is not explosive right now and this affects the Bears defense. The whole concept of the defense is built around having great play from the three techniques. Harris has been too inconsistent and this is why the Bears are so inconsistent.

This is dead-on. Harris's act is growing very tired. Tommie, the media is not blocking your ass. Harris is not coming off the ball and does not have the size to dominate the middle. A 3-technique is really not supposed to clog; he is supposed to attack and disrupt. Harris may command an initial double, but the extra OL quickly moves on to another defender. On passing downs, Dvorcek and Israel Idonojie are more effective. Harris needs to shut his mouth and earn that salary. If anyone should be losing sleep, it's Harris-for stealing money and wins from our team.

I am heading to Lambeau, aka "Football Mecca" for the big game. I would not be going if Orton was out. Love ya' Neckbeard. You can count on Kyle to do whatever it takes to play, which is another way to say "No chance that midget is getting into the biggest divisional game of the season. This game could be a shootout. The Pack defense has been depleted with injuries to top players. The Bears D will now face a receiving corps that rivals any in the League. Just think what Kerry Collins would have done with a true deep threat. Ouch. The Baboon-ich must come up with a way to get pressure on Aaron Rodgers or this will be ugly.

TIME TO PUT the D in DEFENSE

2008-11-06T19:01:00.000-08:00

Thank God for good junior high football coaching. Bob Babich decides at halftime of the LION game to stop the insanity, the coming-out party for the great Dan Orlavsky. For one half, sweet Dan, looked like DAN MARINO, picking apart the Bears pass defense and their formidable lack of pass rush. The genius Babich decides that the BLITZ would be an effective tactic against a young, green QB. Thanks, Bob. Only one half of hypertension to weaken my heart for life. Thanks loads.

Kyle or no Kyle, Rex aside, this Titan game is a test for the defense and the O-line. Tennessee is big and mean. They will come right at you. In the immortal words of Al McGuire, the Titans will bring no "french pastry." It will be a slobberknocker of a game. The Bears better strap it up, because the tougher team will win. This reminds me of the 2004 game in Pittsburgh. The Steelers, in the cold and snow, powered by a soon-to-be-retired Jerome Bettis, kicked the snot out of the Bears and launched themselves into a championship run. It was an ass-whipping. That's what I love about football. It ain't complicated. You will find out on Sunday who is really capable of being a champion. There will be no where to hide. I can't wait.

Brian Urlacher has looked like an ordinary player when I have actually looked at him. He is not the same guy. He has lost the burst, the explosion that he was known for. You can see it on his blitzing. It is not his fault; he has hit the wall. Lance Briggs has been very good and has covered for Urlacher on the inside. Also, the cover-2 is dead. Urlacher takes himself out of the action with that deep pass drop. Opposing teams don't go deep middle; they find the underneath or the shorter routes.

What I fear you will see on Sunday is a defense that gets manhandled by a bigger front. The Bears are not stout inside and their backers are not powerful enough to stop the run. Tennessee will not have to throw to win. If the Bears can rise up, press the outside receivers man-to-man and load up on the run, they have a shot. I just think that their scheme is obsolete and their personnel is undersized for this opponent.

On the other side, they have to keep the Titans off balance. Grossman has to get into a rhythm. If it goes three and out-three and out, they will get steamrolled. The good thing about this game is that the Bears know what is coming. The question is...can they handle it and give it right back.

Week 9 is Fine

2008-11-01T04:24:00.000-07:00

The blog writing took the bye week to recharge the battery. It helps that the Viking game was so much fun. I really had a good time, other than the fact that they keep squeezing the cars into the South lot. It's getting tighter amd tighter. They are really trying to squeeze me out. They are pissing me off. Didn't I just say that I had fun?

The reality is that when your quarterback plays well and you can score points, the game is much easier to enjoy. I love defense and hard-hitting more than most, but when you grind out the wins, it can be unsatisfying. The Bear offense has been good lately. Neckbeard the pirate, has been quite the swashbuckler.

Mike Singletary is one of my football heroes. He has no capacity for bullshit. His press conference after the 49er's last game was an example. He said what every football fan wants to say. It's what every football man believes. You aren't supposed to say it to a pro? F that. The real shame is that Mike has to say it at all. These divas get paid to play. The 49er's suck and most of them are losers. The media is beautiful. Especially the ex-coach commentators. If those loads knew what motivated these pricks, wouldn't they have coaching jobs? I believe the best way to motivate most players is to threaten them with their jobs. Jimmie Johnson, Parcells, Coughlin did it that way. They won some Super Bowls with that little tactic. But then the media and players would call them mean and cruel. Boo hoo, sissies.

Here comes the Lion. I fear any team that is 0 for the season. Start fast, boys and let them suck on the jetwash.

Cherish All Time That You Have Been Given...by your Offensive Line

2008-10-13T15:10:00.000-07:00

I never thought much of Matt Ryan coming into the NFL. I was wrong about that guy. Yesterday, he was given all day to throw, and he made the most of it. He shredded the Bears for 301 yards and pulled the game out in the end. Really, the Falcons and Ryan dominated the game all but for 4 minutes in the 4th quarter. The Bears did not deserve to win.

The Bears need a talent upgrade at defensive end. Brown and Wale are solid pros, but they are not difference makers. Another game with no pressure, no sacks and no turnovers. I have said it before and will say it again, we have to get more talented on both sides of the line. The defensive tackle position is deep and good, but you don't expect your tackles to get sacks. There needs to be pressure because we can't cover right now. I think healthy or not, Nathan Vasher is struggling to cover people. Tillman is constantly banged up. On that last deep out, Marcus Hamilton had his head in the backfield, did not get enough depth and allowed that completion to be a lot easier than it should have been. It wasn't Mike Brown's fault.

The squib quick was a weeny call. Shame on Lovie for not playing to win. Lovie. Let's eat the remainder of his contract and get Bill Cowher.

The Kyle Orton Experience is getting surreal. I am afraid to say it, but I think we got ourselves a quarterback. That last drive was all Orton. He looked great.

What the hell is going on with Tommie Harris spastic re-fumble? I mean, enough of this guy. Dusty Dvorcek is doing a great job. Oh, one more thing, Devin Hester needs to start running again on his kick returns. You learn that in youth football. If you stop, you're dead. And you will get hurt. Devin is progressing as a receiver but regressing on the returns. It is like he wants out.

Big battle for the NFC North lead on Sunday. I will be there and will officially lose my voice. I have to give up one for the team.

I Really Don't Have Anything To Say

2008-10-09T18:51:00.000-07:00

The Bears got 'er done on Sunday, but it was 3-0 for a little too long for my liking. They began the second half with a "foot on the throat" drive for a touchdown and that did it. Good to see them put a bad team on the hoof and stomp them.

Tommie Harris apologized to the team and his fans. Then, he went on to talk about how he lost his way spiritually. Whatever. My spirit would be tied to the $10 million. Get out there and play. Talent. What a burden. Let's see what happens when we put the pads on.

Atlanta will be a tough game. On the road with against a team that's no pushover. The Falcons have suprised many people with their start. I am never suprised. They are professionals; they have pride. What is suprising is the play of rookie QB Matt Ryan. I will admit that I was not high on this kid coming into the league. However, the Falcons have put him in a position to be successful, and the guy has a great arm. So, I stand corrected. Let's shut down the Michael Turner running show and put these guys down.

The Kyle Orton experience heads into Week Six. I have enjoyed it so far. Orton gets better every week. He is a leader. He is tough. He is becoming very dependable. I will stop talking now. The Jinx, you know.

Chicago Baseball...Catch the Fever

2008-10-03T18:59:00.000-07:00

As our two baseball teams crap in their respective hats, it's a perfect time to cuddle up with some football. There has been a game on every night this week. I haven't watched them, but I love the effort. It is my gridiron security blanket. When I need it, it's there. So dependable, my blanky.

Cub fans gotta be feelin' the pain. It's one thing to get beat, but to play as bad as they have (errors & walks) really hurts. Too bad. As for the Sox...they have no clutch in them.

Tommie Harris got suspended because he is never on time. He thinks he is bigger than the program. I am losing faith in this guy by the day. He can't stay on the field, and he has a big mouth. He bitched at management for cutting Mark Bradley loose. Tommie, lay off the talent evaluation. Bradley produced nothing but stomach cramps. He was another guy who couldn't stay healthy, get open or catch. Tough traits for a receiver. Harris needs to shut up and play. Lovie needs to shut him down if he is injured. I hate the fact that the Bears play this cloak-and-dagger game with injuries. If the dude is hurt, I want to know. I think if you give a guy $10 million, he can get to meetings and treatment on time. Be a professional.

Michael Lombardi of National Football Post called out Bernard Berrian for his inability to hold on to the ball. I called this one. Berrian was going to get overpaid. He is not a big time playmaker. He is a straight ahead, fly pattern, speed receiver. He is not dynamic and not worthy of the millions Minnesota gave him. You had to let him go. He is no better than what we have right now. Jerry Angelo, this is not a compliment.

Our player evaluation is so much stronger on the defensive end than the offensive end. I see Corey Graham, Nick Roach, Marcus Harrison all get plugged in and produce. On offense, we can't get any depth in the talent pool. They got it right with Forte. They finally put in Beekman. This is good. By the way, on Sunday night when we had third and seven and needed a first down late in the game, Forte got 10 yards right over Beekman. You got to play the Boston College O-lineman. They are tough sons of bitches. The Bears should know this.

Anyway, I want Brandon Rideau activated for this week. Let's see what he can do. In several preseasons, this guy went up and caught the ball. He scores touchdowns. I don't believe these coaches when they say that this kid is not ready. I trust they believe he could be or why would he be on the team. Throw him the ball. It can't hurt.

Be prepared for the endless game vs. the Lion. Kitna may throw the ball a Greise-like 70 times. It will be a slow clock.

Roller Coaster of Love (for now)

2008-10-01T11:37:00.000-07:00

I enjoyed the game Sunday night. It was, for me at least, the most entertaining Bear game I have seen in a while. A great defensive effort with benefits-3 Bear offensive touchdowns. The offense has had one putrid half, the 1st half vs. Tampa Bay. Other than that, they are giving me more on offense than I expected. Many analysts say that the Eagles gave it away, that we got lucky. Whatever. We beat a good team. We played really hard for 4 quarters. We got a first down at the end of the game when we needed one badly. We drafted a very good running back. All that is cause to celebrate for 15 minutes.

Orton can really see the field. He does not always make the best throw, but at least he is finding the right receiver. After four weeks of watching him, I can say that it was the right call to start him over Grossman. A real easy call, actually.

Great crowd. Not an empty seat in the house, loud, everyone stayed till the end and pretty well-behaved. Not as much sloppy drunkenness as in the past. My crowd got a little unruly when they were informed that I forgot to bring the buns. What a bonehead. However, after the orgy of grilled encased ground meats, I was propelled back to the throne. Sausage-There is No Substitute.

Nothing would throw the momentum right into the abyss more than a less-than-stellar effort against the Lion in Detroit on Sunday. We need to come out smokin', just like this past Sunday night. I love the opening three-play touchdown drive. Wow! Who were those guys?

The Sox are roaring into the playoffs after an exciting, white-knuckler last night. I applaud the "Black Out" attire concept with one caveat. Is the all-black clothing an effective intimidation tactic during a night baseball game. Did the Twins say to themselves, "I can hear these fans, but where are they?" Purely from a fashion standpoint, black is very slimming. This is a plus for most southsiders, considering their love of encased ground meats. I bet the folks at the game were feeling thin and sexy. Good for them.

I endorse playoff baseball. I encourage you to go ahead and watch...it's O.K. It's exciting stuff. If the Sox lose early, I want the Cubs to win it all. It will be months of pure hell, but eventually that will blow over. Then they can shut the fu&* up about the curse, Bartman, and the wait till next year bullshit that they have been spewing during my 42 years of life. It needs to end and end soon. So, if it must be so, then GO CUBBIES! You know, Lou Pineilla should go to the black. It would help him out way more than the home white with pinstripes or those (Ugh!) very unflattering road grays.

Wish Me Luck

2008-09-25T19:21:00.000-07:00

Yes, I watched the Bucs game on Sunday, and, no I don't want to talk about it. As The Colonel Pacino said in Scent of a Woman, "If I was twenty years younger, I would TAKE A BLOWTORCH TO THIS PLACE!!!" That's how I feel about Halas Hall. I want to punch Lovie Smith in the crotch. HOOO AHH!

Sunday night...Bears v. Eagles...I'm goin'. It's about the food, man. Hopefully, I will be able to keep it down. If you watched the Eagles/Steelers game last week, you saw the Eagle defense beat the (I don't know any other way to say it) FUCK out of Ben Roethlisberger. They blitzed on every play. They blitzed very well on every play. The Steelers O-line got whupped. I am visualizing the Bears O-line dealing with this onslaught, and all I can offer is one kick-ass bratwurst. I may stay in the parking lot. They should dress Lovie and let him play QB. Knock the stupid right out of him.

When you blow double-digit leads late in a game, it is a reflection on your toughness. That's coaching. Toughen 'em up or get some tougher guys. Bad tackling, stupid penalties, a team looking fatigued in the 4th quarter? C'mon coach, let's let them know, if you can't cut it, you're out of a job. Threaten their livelihood. That's how you motivate these spoiled jagbags.

George W. Bush has bankrupted or failed every business that he ever had a part. He couldn't find oil in Texas. Is it just a coincidence that our economy is in the tank? This election can't happen fast enough. I cannot wait for the George W. Bush Library. Can you file comic books, Cliff Notes and Cracked magazine under the Dewey Decimal System?

Hey, that's not football. On the positive, Matt Forte is pretty good. Orton had a good second half. I am trying not to remember the first half; you recall, the half where the Bears average starting position was the Bucs 41 yard-line. The half where that field position, handed to the offense by the defensive turnover orgy, resulted in 3 points. YOU REMEMBER. This is enough of the positive paragraph. I'm losin' it.

Ever since Lovie pushed out Ron Rivera and put his buddy Bob Babich in at D-coordinator, our defense has looked sloppy. This was a really bad move. Rivera had this defense (with the same personnel) carrying a team to the Super Bowl. What problem was there? It was so big, it could not be overcome? Someone needs to explain this to me.

I need to stop talking now. It's sucking my will to tailgate. Let's do the Mojito.

Sleep It Off

2008-09-14T16:00:00.000-07:00

Today, you saw why the Bears gave Rex Grossman so many chances at QB1. He may throw the deep ball as well as anyone in the NFL. Of course, the Bears coaches are enamored with talent over football skill. That is why you see Orton doing well with the tools he has. He is a football player. But he is not a very good football player; he has shortcomings. His shortcomings don't turn into turnovers ala Rex. But he cannot stretch the field and capitalize on the few deep opportunities he gets in a game. Of the 300,000 passes he threw in college, not one of them was over 15 yards. You saw it today. The Bears offense was exposed to the masses for what it is. Not very good. You can have speed and potential, but results and points are what counts.

That being said, this was a game that we should have won. We need an offensive coach who can call a two-minute drill. The last two possessions on offense were horribly played. It is either they don't believe in their wide-outs and tight ends or just forget to throw to them like a normal football team. Either way, you will see this all year. You just get the first down, four more plays and get in field goal range. Put it on your QB. That is what he dreams about. A fullback dive on 4th and 1 with the game on the line. Who made that call, the Smart Quiz winner from AM 780?

Another example of Bears talent evaluation. Chris Harris was dumped by the Bears because they loved Kevin Payne. Payne is younger, faster and flashes great potential. Harris just led the league in fumbles caused with 8 last season. The number 8 would be the number of crucial tackles Payne has missed this year already. Your strong safety needs to be a solid tackler. Payne is always around the ball, he just can't stop the guy who holds it. For a defense that values the takeaway so much, this decision still rankles. Harris's strip of Greg Olsen changed the game.

They need to tell the kick return teams that the illegal blocks in the back are not working. It would be one thing if you tried to cheat and sprung your guy for a huge return. All three of these penalties came on no-gain returns. And killed us on field position. A couple penalties hurt, dropped or missed passes; this game came down to the fact that the offense couldn't get a drive for 3 quarters. Or a first down. St. Clair couldn't handle Julius Peppers, and I now await the second coming of Fred (I lost my wallet) Miller. It will be an improvement. The only thing St. Clair blocks well is oxygen. Devin Hester pulls a rib? Again, we very easily could have started 2-0 with both wins on the road. I still had us at 0-2 at this point.

I was furious after this game. I put Mary Cate in for a nap and fell asleep myself. A gift of a nap. When I woke up, I was so happy for the rest, I lost my anger. I think I'm growing as a human being.

What the Hell?

2008-09-09T16:07:00.000-07:00

Remember one of those nights when you were feeling a little tired or sluggish, maybe on a Sunday, and you didn't really feel like going out. A friend talks you into it. "Only for an hour or so," you said. Your destination wasn't promising, your expectations were low and you absolutely positively weren't drinking. Then, you get there. There was a band playing that you never heard of and they kicked ass. A bunch of people you knew showed up and they were fired up. The drinks started flowing; you were singing and dancing; you got home at 3:00 a.m. and didn't even mind that you had to get up for work/class at 7:00 a.m. It was a memorable night, but a night you couldn't repeat with a plan or a goal. Unexpectedly, it was as much fun as you could ever have.

That was Sunday night in Indy. No one had lower expectations for this game than me. It was about class, like in horse racing. They had it; we didn't. 60 minutes later, the Bears had dominated the Colts. I can't believe I just wrote that sentence. They controlled the line of scrimmage all night. Who were those impostors on the offensive line? Forte is the real deal, but I could have run through those holes. What the hell is going on out there?

Never doubt this defense. I won't. They were flying around like Killer Bees. Some tackling needs to be better (Kevin Payne), but how about them Bears. Just great. They overcame the mistakes, especially Hester's folly (which finally got Lovie to crack the "Lovie Face"), like a real competitive football team.

All that being said, I worry that the consistency will not be there. I fear that this version of Bears will torment me all season. Can we recapture the magic? I like Kyle Orton. I like his confidence, his courage and his head. But his receiving corps is still a pupu platter. What will happen when the opposition loads up for the run? You see what happens when you can run it well, so well that you are running the ball on third down, converting first downs regularly. Even Ron Turner can't fuck up play calls. I will not indulge my urge to gush. It was a great moment for a Bear fan. The moments over. Here come the Panthers.

Did I mention that this dominant performance was ON THE ROAD! Sorry, I gushed.

John Madden says that every NFL fan is devastated by Tom Brady's season-ending injury. I say "Fuck him!" He cavorted around all summer with his "new-style American girlfriend," flipping the bird to the football gods. He blew a 18-0 season in the Super Bowl. Any jinx-fearing football player would have holed up in Apollo Creed's gym from Rocky 3 and emerged for camp looking like mini-Terminator muscled QB. I don't feel bad. Maybe he will come down to earth, taking over Ditka's role as spokesman for Cialis with all of his free time.

That movie "Sixteen Candles" really holds up. Describing the Bears on Sunday, in the words of Farmer Ted, "I'm at a loss."

Driving To Despair

2008-08-18T15:28:00.000-07:00

The family roadtrip vacation is now one for the ages. On Saturday, we left Hershey, Pennsylvania at 9:00 a.m. Eastern Time. I put in the final marathon stretch of driving through the last of 13 states, covering 10 days of family togetherness, to arrive home at 7:30 p.m. Central Time. Just in time to see the Bears play the Seahawks in Preaseason practice game 2. After two quarters, I wanted to get back in the car. After two years of listening and reading about our quarterback situation, you all got to see in living color how bad this offensive line really is. Grossman had no chance. It was as if the line refused to block, imposing their own will (or lack of one) on this QB "controversy." "Hey," they were saying, "we are the truly shitty part of this team and its time we got our recognition." So, enough about the QB. It's Orton, and he's taller, so he can see over the oncoming slaughter for a slightly longer time. Enough time to decide on which sideline to throw they ball away and avoid the sack.

If you are ever in Orangeberg County, South Carolina, be sure to find Duke's Barbecue. It is a little shack of a place off the interstate in a small town just north of Columbia. When you walk in, you are summoned to a cafeteria steam table, no different than the one in your high school lunchroom. What that table contains is the best barbecue that you can find in the world. For $7.50, the lady behind the counter pulls out a large Styrofoam takeout plate with sections. Telling her that I was a rookie, she gave me the house specials. Pulled pork like I love it, slightly dry, not fatty and tender. There was very good, not overly sweet slaw. The hash is an orange concoction (allegedly pig innards ground into mush) spread over rice. Yummy. There were hush puppies too. But the kicker was the sauce. It was a sweet mustard sauce. It was heavenly. All these years of barbecue sauce, I had no idea. It's mustard. I am still thinking about that plate.

The Bottom Line Gives No Goosbumps.

2008-08-01T08:52:00.000-07:00

The Bears organization is not a dynamic entity. It takes no chances and plays the game within the restraints set up by the salary cap and the collective bargaining agreement. This is a result of Bears ownership valuing the bottom line of profit in how they run the team. Winning is secondary to the revenue generated from their product. The Halas family, the McCaskeys, have no fortune generated from another venture. They don't have the bottomless pockets of a Mark Cuban or Daniel Snyder. The Bears are their livelihood, not their hobby. Thus, a conservative approach to hiring coaches and a general manager has been their mandate. As a result, we Bear fans get a bland and safe football team. Always a chance to be good, but never great.

This is why we long for Ditka. Not because he was such a great coach, but because he was exciting, unpredictable and fun. We would settle for that. This team we have cannot and will not win a championship. The ownership's profit-driven mentality allows for the recent team structure that completely neglects the offensive side of the football. I think it is because offensive players as a rule make more money than defensive players. The more talent on offense, the more they have to spend on player salaries. With a strong defense, the score remains close and maybe we can pull one out of our ass. Isn't that the feeling you get watching a Bear game? When the moment comes, and it comes in almost every game, when Bears offense needs to score a touchdown, you realize that you have absolutely no hope that they can get it done. Instead, we lean on our crutches, the chance that the defense scores or Hester shakes loose. Devin Hester is the worst thing that could have happened to this team. It allows Lovie and Jerry Angelo to continue to ignore improving the talent on offense.

This is no knock on Hester at all. He is a great kick returner, the best I have ever seen or read about. But Hester is cheaper than actually paying a real NFL quarterback, a real NFL running back and a real NFL receiver. Aikmen, Smith and Irvin would never happen in Chicago, not in a million years. This lack of energy, of vision, of adventure has gotten us to this point. Potentially the worst offense we have seen in Chicago in decades, but still a chance to get 9 wins. That and an opportunity to get taken out to the woodshed in a playoff game. This is no way to live Bear fans.

I'll Gladly Take the Duct Tape

2008-07-25T16:49:00.000-07:00

I envy the baseball fan. Winter slips away, a new season approaches, and hope springs eternal. It is the right of every baseball fan to look forward to the arrival of pitchers and catchers. To dream of a World Series. To say, "This is our year."

I am not a baseball fan. I don't believe in fairy tales. I am a Bears fan. Summer kicks into the dog days, camp opens, and I feel like beating Lovie Smith. This is the birthright of every Bears fan. Especially, this preseason. What do I have to look forward to? An offense built out of cardboard and duct tape, while the Colts (season opening foe)drive a shiny, chrome Ferrari. I take that back, an offense built out of cardboard and scotch tape. Duct tape is strong, durable and dependable. Powerful. Comparing the Bears offense to duct tape is an insult to duct tape. Cardboard, too.

How bad is it? When your team is wringing it's hands due to the failure of their projected #1 receiver to report, when that receiver has never really played receiver since Pop Warner, well, that's bad. When your new 22 year old starting left tackle has to come off the practice field with a weak back (How long you had it? About a "week" back), that's bad. When that championship type defense's window is closing so fast that Clarista Flockhart finds it to be a tight squeeze, that's bad.

The Bears offense is going to be awful. The Horror.

See how I'm not like the baseball fan.

No Bark With His Bite

2008-07-07T09:03:00.000-07:00

Many experts in the world of professional tennis hold that Roger Federer is the greatest player ever to swing a racket. He has won many Grand Slam titles on various surfaces (not clay, however)and notably, had won the last five Wimbeldon championships. Yesterday, Federer lost at Wimbeldon in the longest, most grueling final in Centre Court history. The victor was his arch rival, the young talent Rafael Nadal, who has been Federer's nemesis on clay for years. Nadal is the new king and deserves the title. As to be expected, Federer did not relinquish the title without a fight. Down two sets to nil, RF fought back, winning the next two sets 7-6 and ultimately went down 7-9 in the final, fifth set. It was such a final, so compelling and historic that John McEnroe, in a post-match interview, spontaneously hugged Federer, thanked him for all of the tennis world and appeared to shed a tear or two. Poor Roger looked like someone just gave him a wedgie.

Yet, Federer allowed the hug. Of this there is no dispute, he is the most humble, gracious and nicest world champion in sports. Federer is all class. His post-match comments contained no excuses. He acknowledged that Nadal was the better man that day. He admitted that he gave everything he had and had come up short. He admiited that it hurt to lose in this way. Nonetheless, in epic defeat, Federer held his second place trophy up to the crowd with a proud look on his face. When McEnroe asked Roger if, looking back, he could take some solace in the fact that he had played and lost in the greatest Wimbeldon final ever, Federer admitted that he could.

Can you imagine how an American would have responded to that question? Moreover, how would an American coach or player have responded to Federer's answer? My guess is that many would ridicule and diminish Federer for making such a revelation. That is the American way. Woof, wail and blame. We throw sportsmanship and grace out the window for the bullshit facade and posturing first displayed by professional wrestlers, as if Federer's response and actions in defeat were a sign of weakness. As you know, there is nothing worse in America than being nice. I will mention also that Nadal was wonderful in victory, a true champion and sportsman. It was a glorious ending to a championship. And a lesson on sport.

There is word that Brett Favre might return. Lots of words. Ugh. When you go, stay gone. Bad sign when you cry like a bitch during your retirement press conference. Translation-Means your not ready to go. Dumb ass.

It's Called Football

2008-07-01T04:38:00.000-07:00

I have a guilty sports pleasure. I love European Soccer. This revelation is the equivalent of admitting that I like Kelly Clarkson's second album...alot. (I'm 42 years old; I have obviously outgrown feeling embarrassment) Anyway, this year, two of the best European soccer tournaments were played within weeks of each other, the UEFA Champions League and Euro '08. They were fantastic.

I am late to soccer. I held the sport in the same regard as most Americans. It was a sissy sport played by European pretty boys who flopped around on the ground like suffocating fish. That and the lack of scoring were death to the "futbol." Then in 1998, while awaiting the arrival of the great Molly McQuaid, I watched the World Cup. That year the US team, always an inferior side, made an incredible run to the elimination round, upsetting Colombia along the way. More than patriotism took hold, I watched other teams and found the world's best players all competing in one tournament. I was hooked. The game was like chess on cleats, and when attacking the goal, it was pure art in action.

That being said, I cannot watch MLS or any other inferior brand of soccer. Those teams have neither speed nor touch. That is boring. I want attacking soccer, always moving forward toward the keeper. Even in World Cup, many teams play a defensive game, afraid to push the ball up, to make a mistake, to leave themselves vulnerable to a counter-attack. I loathe this strategy. I can say that because I have learned enough about the game to criticize a weak, safe and dull strategy. Get in the ring and fight. Call it the Teddy Roosevelt in me. Moreover, I am a big fan of the greatest offensive, attacking league in the world, the English Premier League aka "The Premiership."

I offer the EPL to the soccer novice because it is the most skilled and entertaining soccer in the world. The best and highest paid players come to England to display their skills. Unfortunately, four teams dominate the league. There is no salary cap, so the owners who spend the most money get the best players. The four are Manchester United (Yankees), Chelsea (Red Sox), Arsenal and Liverpool. I root for Liverpool. Three reasons. The red shirts, their fans and, of course, the Beatles. They also have my favorite player, the Larry Bird of soccer, Steven Gerrard.

EPL football is played at the highest speed and is played in the offensive end. The fans will boo their own team when they kick the ball back defensively to their own goalie. They don't play for overtime or penalty kicks. Penalty kicks are the worst way to end a game. Some teams play for penalties. Recently, in the Euro, Italy played eventual champion, Spain, in the quarterfinal. The Italians played like fruits, dropping all their players back in the defensive zone and never attacked the Spanish goal. They were playing 90 minutes of regulation and the mandatory 30 minutes of overtime, pleased with a 0-0 score and a chance to steal a win on penalty kicks. It was a disgrace. The Spanish won on the penalty kicks, thankfully. The Spanish played the most beautiful soccer consistently in this tournament. Later, the Italian coach was fired. He told the press that "it was a shame to lose my job to a loss on penalty kicks." I say, "You played for penalty kicks, you f-ing greaseball." He was the coach,; he planned the strategy. Good riddance.

The common American criticisms of soccer have now fallen on my deaf ears. I don't enjoy players who "flop." However, even a tough player has to go down once and a while. You cannot get the legs and spikes into players. There is no reason for a player to "tough" it out when this happens. He is entitled to have a foul called for his team. You have to let the ref know. Most soccer refs would make the NBA refs look like heroes. As for the boring play, well I just covered that. I am steering you in the proper direction. Low scoring...that is a prejudice of an impatient American. We are the most impatient people in the world. These people think that their lives are so important. Assholes. Slow down, tough guy. It is amazing that we still have bookstores in America. We really don't have "bookstores." We have the "book, music, movie and coffee stores." Typical America. Have to get it all in one stop. I mean, who has the time, right. Assholes.

The greatest moment in Euro 08 was the television coverage. The final was on ABC, channel 7. During the game, no commercials. That's right, no commercials. Any EPL game on Fox Sports, no commercials. One more time, no commercials. Also, you know how during NFL games, the networks force the announcers to hype their other programming, "Jack Bauer rescues Katie Holmes from the clutches of the Evil Gnome on "24", FOX TONITE!!" Well during the Euro final that did happen, once. The commentator began to read a spot on an upcoming ABC show and suddenly stopped. "We'll get back to that in a second...Schweinsteiger has the ball forward in the Spanish zone." One spot, and he blew it off because the game was more important. Priceless. I can imagine the pre-broadcast meeting. ABC Advertising Geek-"Adrian, we want you to read 15 spots during game play." Adrian-"Fuck off, Yank. I will read one...Maybe." He did finally read the spot. I could hear his teeth gritting the whole time.

Signing and Sighing

2008-06-24T18:10:00.000-07:00

The Tommie Harris extension was a no-brainer. When he is on the field and healthy, there is no better defensive tackle in the league. He is a dominant, young, game-changing player. As pleased as I am about his new deal, let's not forget that despite 3 straight Pro Bowls, Harris has not been consistently healthy. The fact that he admitted to playing hurt all of last year in order to earn the big cash is commendable, but his injury history should scare the Bear fan. Last year, Harris was not the player for whom offensive coordinators game plan. I remember a young Adrian Peterson and the Viking offensive line kicking the shit out of Bears on the ground. I remember a lot of rushing yards yielded last season. Make no mistake, getting this deal done was crucial to our future, but I am cautious in my optimism.

Don't give the Bears front office too much credit for the Harris signing. This kind of deal, the team locking up a young star and avoiding a franchise tag or free agency, is standard operating procedure in this NFL era. The alternative is disaster, losing a stud in his prime. It just doesn't happen. If it does, GM's lose jobs. Thanks for not fucking this up. That's all the Bears suits get. If you want some real ass-kissing, let's see how y'all do with Devin. Get 'er done, boys.

Reverse Psycho

2008-06-12T19:43:00.000-07:00

Dave Haugh, the Tribune's Bears beat writer, nails the sad history of Cedric Benson in this article. Enough said.

Now for something completely different. Urlacher pissed off BearLand, bitched about his contract in the press and purposely blew off Organized Team Activities. Bad move. However, he appeared for mandatory mini-camp and then told the GM that he wants to retire a "Bear." It appears that this renegotiation will get done. Moments later, Benson goes off the reservation and gets himself cut. Yesterday, Urlacher shows up for OTAs. To a man, every teammate says what a great feeling it is to have their leader and best player back on the field and in the locker room.

Did he plan this? I don't give him credit for being that smart, but I admit, when I read about his appearance at Halas Hall, I felt all warm and gooey for old #54. What a turnaround. Add Benson's boner, it gives the fans a good perspective on the difference between an All-Pro professional and a first-round bust. Got to have Brian Urlacher on the squad. If I had the purse strings, I would be loosening them for Urlacher. He could thank Cedric for the raise.

As the dog days of summer approach, the thoughts of this middle-aged man turn to...bratwurst. The quest for the best brat has concluded. Of course, the Johnsonville will always be a quality choice. You can't go wrong there. Plus, accessibility is key. When you can go to Jewel and cover your sausage run, it saves time. If you got the time, I got the new King. Just drive to Elburn, Illinois and buy the fresh brats at the Elburn meat market. Or get off at the last and furthest stop on a Chicago commuter train. It is near Sugar Grove. In other words, it's far. But so worth it. It is a true German brat. It has a great casing for grilling and is full of flavor with no obvious fat. I know that it has fat, but it doesn't explode from the run off of fat. I can't explain it; just come to the tailgates next season. They are very good.

Illinois High School football schedules are out today. That is always a landmark date for me. There will be some football watching this season. And it ain't gonna be on many Sundays. Friday nights and Saturdays, preferably. NFL tickets available.

Calling All Sober Running Backs

2008-06-07T09:25:00.000-07:00

Cedric Benson was arrested for DWI last night in Austin, Tx. He was pulled over after 3:00 a.m. by police. This is bad news for the Bears. He has to go, this Benson. I may have given him the benefit of the doubt on the Boating WI that he received several weeks ago. Now, I know that Benson does not care about winning, his teammates or the fans who support his team. Why can't he stay in or go home early or hire a driver or designate a driver? I could go on and on. These were the same questions we were asking about Tank Johnson a year ago. The Bears cut him despite the fact that his DWI was ultimately dropped. It doesn't matter if Benson is innocent. It's clear that his priority is not football. It's Cedric Benson.

This current disaster happened after I just watched the replay of Benson's best start as a Bear. Bears v. Broncos 2007, the evening Devin Hester tore up the Broncos. Well, early on, Hester muffed a punt which led to a Denver touchdown. It was Benson who kept the Bears in the game. Benson was coming off his 11 carry for 89yard performance against the Seahawks. He had a 43 yard run in that game which the Bears lost. I recall the coaches were criticized for not running the ball more during that game.

Well, they came out running versus Denver. Benson looked great. He ran hard, found daylight and powered downhill. He finished his runs with his pads down. He ran with abandon. He was consistent and looked like a real NFL running back. At least until his last carry, his eighth. It was a good long run, over 10 yards. As he was tackled, he twisted his ankle. Season over. That is the other way we will remember Benson. Arrested or Injured. The only time this moron gets a designated driver is when he is carted off the gridiron. Or being driven from a crime scene in bracelets. I feel woozy.

What's next? We have to find some running backs to plug the hole. It can be done. You just have to be creative. Maybe rookie Matt Forte can cover us until 2009, but I would scour every roster and search for that hidden gem. The Packers got huge dividends for the minor expense it took to snag Ryan Harris from the Giants. Just be active and open-minded, and I guarantee we will come out of this OK. I am talking myself into this. Benson, the bad decisions on and off the field aside, still cannot stay healthy. Hasn't and never will. So, let's say goodbye and move on. I think I'm O.K. now.

On the contract topic, this Devin Hester thing is a real dilemma. He wants out of his rookie deal. I agree. However, he wants #1 receiver money. I cannot agree. As awesome as he is, Hester is not even a solid #2 receiver in the league. He is the greatest returner in league history. There is no set pay level for someone like Hester. He should be the highest paid return guy ever, but I that cannot be enough money. He may never be a good receiver. I suspect that he will, but you can't pay on spec. (See Cedric Benson or any first round bust) Based on past performance, the Bears should front load a 3 year deal with millions in bonus money and heavy incentives on receiving performance. Pay him now for lighting up the NFL for two straight years, but performance base the rest of the dough. After a few years, if Hester becomes an every down stud, he can back up the Brinks truck. Make no mistake, the league will stop kicking to this guy this year. Then, the Bears will have to find new ways to get him the ball. I look forward to that.

Sticking to the Law Business

2008-05-26T04:34:00.000-07:00

My wife caught me reading Strunk & White's Elements of Style. It is a small book on writing, a primer on clear and concise writing. She thinks I am crazy. I can't disagree. I read great writing, and I want to do it. I read my favorite writer's blogs, yes, blogs, and I want to be able to write like they do. I read a Hemingway short story, and I want to kill myself. I read it, want to do it, try it, fail at it and feel crappy about it. It is so hard to do and doesn't come to me easily. So I read Elements of Style and hope for inspiration. I am better off reading The Enquirer. The writing in that tabloid does not inspire suicide.

The R. Kelly trial is in full swing. During jury selection, I had to go into that courtroom. They have their own Sheriff's security team, screening all who enter, metal detectors and everything. You would expect to then board a plane. Initially, they made me pull out my ID and empty my pockets. After a few moments, the sergeant in charge said, "He is a lawyer; he has been in a courtroom before; he knows what to do." Later, I rode down the elevator with him. I said, "Some setup." He said, "Yeah, I should have brought my big, floppy shoes and red nose." He is right. It's a circus, a black-eye to the legal system.

You have the judge, Ringmaster Ned, leading the nonsense. You have the lawyers, hamming it up with their "pointed" questions and phony demeanor, yelling and bellowing at witnesses. The media plays it all up, giving everyone a forum for their acting. The case has no victim, or a victim who cares. She and her family continue to honor their promise, keeping their mouths shut for money. That would be in contrast to every other witness in the case who was paid off, and yet still testify against their benefactor.

On our descent, the sergeant and I lamented the true nature of 26th Street. While this legal farce continues, there are issues of real consequence being decided in the building. Family members of murder victims seeking closure and some idea of peace, defendants accused falsely of committing a crime, some of the best lawyers and prosecutors in America conducting the business of justice with honor and professionalism, unconcerned about their names being in print or their faces appearing on television.

As all of this occurs, Memorial Day is upon us. Many lawyers, especially defense lawyers, like to tell potential jurors that jury service is the second most important duty that can be undertaken by an American citizen. They also may say that our soldiers defend our freedom and our way of life. They will point to our legal system as the best, and the one truly American institution that separates us from the rest of the world. I am one of those lawyers. I say those things because I believe them with my whole heart and soul.

I believe that to shirk jury service, to trivialize it or blow it off, is a slap in the face to every soldier that picked up a rifle and served this country. I am sickened by the excuses given for being unable to serve on a jury or being unable to answer the questions honestly. They sicken me, these so-called Americans. Their lives are trivial in comparison to the lives of those who make such sacrifices on their behalf. Take a few hours or days and give the justice system your best. It is the least you can do.

Today, I consider the the commitment of our soldiers and all who assist in their efforts. I think of all those who have paid the price of freedom throughout our history. They are the reason I have this vocation. I honor them by my commitment to justice and our system of government and laws. I try to remember them every time I step into the well of a courtroom and open my mouth. I hope I do them proud.

TV Sucks.

2008-05-12T09:22:00.000-07:00

The final episode of the "Wire" has come and gone long ago. There is nothing on television worth watching, at least not regularly. No sports can hold my interest. An occasional "Frontline" might cause me to watch the tube. Instead, I have watched a couple of movies lately. I watched the baby-faced killer, Matt Damon, aka "Jason Bourne" in The Bourne Ultimatum. I like spy stuff but have a hard time believing that Matt Damon can whip ass.

A sleeper in the spy genre is Spy Game with Robert Redford and Brad Pitt. I am not a fan of either actors recent work. Redford is not a leading man anymore. He is old and saddlebag wrinkly. He is not believable as a hot-chick magnet. He has to pay for the hot chick. (See Indecent Proposal) What is indecent is this old bag getting any young chippy on screen. Pitt can't act. He is only effective when he is not allowed to say a whole lot, plays a young, dim but passionate character and has a strong actor to carry him. (See Seven) A recent example is Troy. He plays Achilles, has his shirt off alot and can pull off the action scenes. The problem is that he has to deliver some emotional lines and show some depth in the character. He cannot pull off a dark side. He is the weak link in an otherwise decent movie.

Spy Game works. Redford can act and plays his age. No love interest for the the Redster. He plays the grizzled veteran spy who makes one last operation to rescue his protegee, Pitt, who went off the reservation to rescue his radical girlfriend from a Chinese prison. Pitt gets to throw a chair and get all emotional over the business of spying and death while Redford carries the film with a strong and likable performance. Every time this one pops up on cable, I'm watching.

This gets me thinking of great supporting roles or cameos from much maligned actors. Scene stealers or unexpected performances. Alec Baldwin in Glengarry Glen Ross and The Departed. Bruce Willis in Nobody's Fool. Travolta in Pulp Fiction. Charles Grodin in Midnight Run. Val Kilmer in Tombstone.

Money, it's a hit.

2008-05-03T20:36:00.000-07:00

Evidently, many Bears fans believe that the decision not to draft a quarterback after the first round is a clear sign that the team is scrapping any plans to make the playoffs in 2008. You may be shocked to know that I believe that the 2008 Bears are not bound for the playoffs anyway, even without a rookie QB sitting on the bench. The QB's drafted after the first round are no better than Kyle Orton. Matt Ryan is no better than Kyle Orton. This is not a time for a rookie. We need to rebuild our line, upgrade our skill people and reinforce the defensive secondary. Then the Bears need to spend some dough on Devin Hester, Brian Urlacher and a veteran QB free agent in 2009.

Renegotiating with Hester is a no-brainer. He is our best weapon, by far. By really far. It is not even funny so far. Tear up the rookie contract and give this kid some real guaranteed money. They owe it to the fans. Urlacher is a little different. He is 30. He was dinged up last year. He has time left on this deal. All true. But he played through the injuries and finished strong. If we continue to run a cover 2 scheme, there is no better middle linebacker in the league than Urlacher. He still creates turnovers, he can still run and continues to be a player the opponent schemes against. He is our leader. Chicago fans are overly critical. 54 has given this town and this team his all. This is not throwing money to a guy as a reward. He will play up to the contract.

If we can get this offense moving in the right direction, a veteran QB is the move. The Bears haven't had a rookie QB develop since McMahon. The line needs to protect, the receivers have to show progress and this running back situation has to produce. The D has a few good years left. I also love Craig Steltz. He will be the next strong safety and will thrive in this scheme. If Mike Brown goes down, which is likely as April snow in this town, watch for Steltz. He also marks the end of the Adam Archuleta Experience. Thank you and goodnight. So, if the Bears can blow the dust off of some cash, let's see the pursuit of a real free agent QB in '09. Make a splash, cheapies. Then, I may be able to justify season tickets, you know, with a real chance at a playoff-winning contender.

Draft Day 2008.

2008-04-26T12:17:00.000-07:00

I have turned on ESPN coverage of the 2008 NFL Draft. Hours of speculation to come. Can I tell you, I hate Steve Young. So smug...and such a blabbermouth. Keyshawn is wearing a black and white checked shirt with a pink tie. This is very distracting, and his commentary can't bring you back from this fashion debacle. Throw Berman on this shit pile and hitting the mute button is the only option. Soon the Bears will pick and for their sake, they better get it right. I will check back in.

Day one is complete, and the Bears did well. Chris Williams was my choice for OT. You can see from the film, he can protect the QB. Williams is smart (Vanderbilt grad), has great feet and will be the starter at left tackle for years to come. Unless he blows out his kneecap and all related tendons or gets shot in the head like the Bears last two first-round offensive lineman picks. Matt Forte from Tulane is a good pick in the second round. A solid running back would be there at that pick, and this guy will push Cedric Benson all preseason. I am very pleased. Not a difficult draft to plan, Bears hit their marks. Day two brings many picks and hopefully, some players will emerge. Help is needed in all areas.

I am almost getting excited for football season. Almost.

My Favorite Chicagoans

2008-04-20T07:07:00.000-07:00

I know the "lawyer" in this John Kass column. http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/opinion/columnists/chi-kasscastlefriapr18,0,1075549.column. I also know the subject of the article, Rudy Acosta. He was a Genson client for a time. I like Acosta more than the lawyer. What a clown. You wonder how I can do this job sometimes.

Another bitching Bear. Now Urlacher wants to rework his contract. He needs the money seeing that he has another fiancee. This guy just loves to give away his money to baby mamas. He should start wearing that cup and supporter 24/7. Kind of like an NFL chastity belt.

Our good governor has left his legacy upon the greater Chicagoland area. He has allowed the destruction-construction of every Illinois tollway and interstate to proceed at the same time. Obviously, he followed the same planning schedule as the Bush administration's Iraq policy. When hairboy is out of office, I will still be driving in construction traffic.

I have been in fiction mode lately. I have just completed my first Daniel Silva spy novel, Mark of the Assassin. Very good. I will do another. Also, I am on another Dennis Lehane novel with his characters, private investigators Patrick Kenzie and Angie Gennaro. Recently, one of this series, Gone, Baby, Gone was made into a movie with Casey Affleck. Lehane also wrote Mystic River. These are good books, not large-type, pulpy bestsellers. Very dark and complicated characters. Also, my car is featuring the recording of Soul Circus by George Pelecanos. Pelecanos was one of the main writers on the Wire, which I have exalted in this blog on several occasions. You can pick up the development of some of the Wire characters in his books. They are highly recommended.

I have had enough reality lately. It is time for some good stories.

Be True to One's "Self"

2008-04-08T17:11:00.000-07:00

A fitting end to the 2007-08 Matt sports season. An overtime national championship game. Kansas deserved the victory, and it pains me not at all to congratulate former Illini hoop coach, Bill Self, on out coaching his slickster counterpart, John Calipari at every turn. First, Memphis was overconfident. So much so that they did not adjust AT ALL to Kansas' defensive strategy. The Jayhawks put up a wall in the middle of the floor, thus eliminating the "drive" from the dribble-drive-motion offense. This "offense du jour" has seen its last days ala the "run n' shoot." Kansas denied Rose the middle, ran its big guys up front and forced Memphis into many bad or guarded shots. The "Cal" did nothing to change it up, even neglecting the baseline attack suggested by Bob Knight at halftime. In the end, Memphis had only two guys looking to score, and Kansas made it tough for them all night.

Self's sharp game decisions culminated in several easy baskets off time-outs including one alley-oop dunk that everyone except Memphis knew was coming. Also, when Derrick Rose started to get off and handle the ball during the Jayhawk nine-point comeback, Ol' Billy switched to a 1-2-2 zone with his larger guard, Brandon Rush up top. You could see Roses's discomfort. In fact, all game, Rose forced the action into traffic and made poor decisions and turnovers. I credit the Kansas defense and thus credit Self.

Finally, the easy call was to foul the piss-poor free throw shooters on the floor wearing the whites. No-brainer for Bill. Then, his boys knocked down the shots in the clutch. Alas, the better team players win the game. Rock, Chalk. Bill, enjoy the $10 million in Stillwater. Once a Cowboy, always a Cowboy. That T. Boone Pickens money at Oklahoma State sure comes in handy y'all.

I enjoyed Bob Knight's comments on ESPN very much. That guy could teach any subject. I learned more about basketball strategy during this tournament than all previous tournaments combined. Digger Phelps, however, is insane. I watched the whole game and could not figure out what the fuck this guy was talking about. He needs to stop talking, forever. When they added Vitale for the postgame analysis, that bald prick kept interrupting the General. OK, let's crunch the numbers. Knight 800+ coaching wins, Vitale career % under .500. I got two words for you Dick...Shut the fuck up.

I went to White Sox opening day. It is always fun to go to Comiskey and observe the crowd. I play several guessing games. Game 1-"How many women at the game?" My guess was 5, and I won. Of those 5, 4 were more manly than me. The one other women was "good-looking" so much so that she was surrounded by 15 guys, 2 of whom actually knew her. Game 2-"Look at the people and decide if "he will be fighting later." One giant sausage party. I swear a Sox crowd would kick the shit out of a Bears crowd anytime. The reason being is that many Cub fans are also attend Bears games. This is not an insult to Cub fans, it is more of a Darwinian truth. Once there was a shooting after a Cubs game. A Sox fan would consider this silly. Guns are for sissies. Better to pummel a dude with a mini-bat and kill him with a back-of-the-head skull kick while the dude has his mouth on the curb like Ed Norton did it in American History X. Much more sporting. Yep, these are the people I grew up with.

By the way, that will be my last baseball game of the year. For the aforementioned reasons. Some movies can only be watched once. See American History X.

Baseball Fever...Get the Vaccine

2008-04-04T18:14:00.000-07:00

Opening Day has arrived. The official beginning of hibernation for my sports jones. Of course, there will be NFL Draft weekend, but I can only tolerate some in-and-out viewing. I will watch the Bears picks (O-line, dummies). This is Final Four weekend, three games left in the season. After that, nothing, only darkness.

I take a very Grinchy attitude toward the unbridled optimism of Chicago baseball fans. First delusion, this is our Cubs/Sox year. Uh huh. And we are not in a recession, gas is cheap and Bush has cunning. Second delusion, baseball=spring=nice weather. Right, enjoy those outdoor seats during April and May in Chicago. Hey Cindy-Lou Who, where is that Roast Beast?

We in the criminal law world lost one of the good ones this week. The Honorable Jim O'Malley, Judge of the Cook County Circuit Court, passed away from a massive heart attack most likely induced from the two years of chemo therapy he endured for throat cancer. Sox fanatic, Notre Dame loyalist and respected judge are all relevant monikers. Always direct, always fair, liked good lawyers and treated you with respect. He was no pushover, but he treated every defendant with a velvet hammer. If he saw a chance to save a young person from a conviction, he would give that kid extra attention. That way, he could get it through their thick skulls that this could be there last trip to criminal court. I met him during these past several years in private practice and was lucky to know him. He is being waked over two days. Obviously, he will be missed by many.

As I get older, I experience more death. It is only natural. However, I find myself more affected by the loss of life as time passes. I truly value life and respect its fragility. I want to spend as much time on this earth loving and being loved. It has become the driving force of my days. I would even go to the world's largest shopping mall during spring break in Minnesota with four daughters (two of which cannot potty solo) and feel good about the experience. Love is frightening.

Hearing about Judge O'Malley's death frightened me. He was not given as much time as he deserved. He was a good man. He deserved more sunrises. I get angry about this. Mostly, I get motivated to live a better life. I can't say I succeed every day, but I sure as hell try.

Not a happy blog entry, I know. My wife got a good look at my gray hair in the sunlight today. I felt stiff and sore after my workout. I have this dull headache lately. I feel stressed out. Maybe I will check out the Illini football scrimmage at Lemont High School next Saturday. Prolong that hibernation for another week. I won't go gently into that good night. Rage against the dying of the light.

I'm So Tired.

2008-03-21T13:33:00.001-07:00

Madeline Kahn sings the above captioned words in the comedy classic, Blazing Saddles. If you have ever seen her performance of this song, you will understand the way that I feel, mentally and physically. "I'm Pooped." It has been a long, dreary winter. I took a week off from the gym and feel some recharge. My head still throbs with the events of the day and of the tomorrow. Just the emergence of the sun can lift my spirits, if only for a short while. C'mon spring, you stubborn bastard.

Speaking of the gym, I witnessed two people engaging in some annoying workout behavior. Now, when I work out, I want to get my work done with as little distraction as possible. Believe me, trying to get effort out of this bag of bones takes full concentration. That is why when I see people at the gym talking, socializing or communicating at length via cell phone, I get agitated. These two f-ers where sitting on machines and talking. Not working out but talking. They would move to the next set of machines and continue. The dude was drinking coffee. OOfa. In between the scintillating conversation, they would eke out a set. Not a drop of sweat between them.

I turned my growing anger into exercise fuel. When I was on the bike, I imagined that during a sprint, I was going to run them over. On the treadmill, I was straining to catch up so I could beat the shit out of them. Every hill climbed on the elliptical ended with a cliff, high enough to push them to their deaths. It was one great workout; I lost 5 pounds and took a minute off my best 2 mile run time. Didn't do much for my mental health.

Bears update. The draft is coming up in April. Just more opportunity to talk about a game. Much more fun to actually play. The Bears also expect full payment on those season tickets. This will be one tough year to write that check. This will be a big high school football year, I can see it. I'm just not right.

Hail to the Chief.

2008-03-15T04:39:00.000-07:00

Defying the basketball gods, Illinois upset Purdue in the Big Ten tournament. The Illini played its most confident game of the year, and I have work to do in Indianapolis. I kinda was hoping that the Illini would continue this season of futility and not make Saturday's semis. I could sit back and relax. Now I will be fully torqued up for the game. The Indiana faithful were buying up tickets for this day, because Indiana was supposed to play Purdue. Instead, Illinois wins and Minnesota upsets the Hoosiers on a falling down lefty push shot with time expiring. F the state of Indiana. Tickets should be plentiful. Maybe I will be courtside. I will be the guy wearing Orange, baby.

It's Over Johnny...IT"S OVER!

2008-03-13T21:09:00.000-07:00

The Wire has ended. My favorite TV show of all time ended its run this past Sunday. I have to say, I'm sad. I don't watch any other fictional television show. I will not be watching another anytime soon. I will miss the stories, the lines and the great acting. I recommend to anyone who has a hankering for a "killer time" to watch the first 3 episodes of Season 1 on DVD. If you aren't hooked, then don't waste your time. Once you are in however, you will be in for the TV ride of your life. When Kathleen and I got hooked during season 3, we got the first 2 seasons on DVD and would watch 3 episodes in a row. I will really miss the show.

To mourn properly, one needs an indulgence. My latest, the oatmeal chocolate chip cookies at Potbelly. Berry Goot. Maybe a corn muffin from Dunkin' Donuts. Or a bag of Dark chocolate peanut M&M's. A tip for you young people, if you eat a whole big box of DOTS in one sitting, the inside of your mouth gets swollen from the sugar overdose. You may need a stop at the ER. It is like an oral allergic reaction to a bee sting.

Our Dairy Queen has been open for 3 weeks. I should be feeling better soon.

The Smell of this Team Needs to be Offensive.

2008-03-07T12:06:00.000-08:00

The Bears wisely stayed out of the careless spending frenzy of the top tier free agent market. Kudos to Jerry Angelo on resigning Lance Briggs at cost. A classic example of a player completely mishandling a contract year and free agency. This miscalculation was all Briggs; his agent, Drew Rosenhaus, albiet somewhat of a tool, is way too smart to advise his players to make such stupid moves. Then, the Bears astutley stayed out of a bidding war for Bernard Berrian, who was way overpayed by Minnesota. Don't worry about the receiver position yet. It ain't over until the last ball is dropped. (See "Moose" Muhammed)

My perfect draft. 1st round, Rashard Mendenhall or one of the stout backs, an Offensive tackle in the 2nd and a receiver in the 3rd. This draft is deep at all three positions, and the Bears need help at all three positions. Let's not F this up with a QB or something equally as dopey. We need Offense and more Offense. Especially up front, bolstering the 5 blocks of Jello.

Now for something completely different. The Tony Rezko trial is on my "must read daily" list. The defense is asserting that Rezko, a tremendously wealthy man, has no incentive to get kickbacks or push contracts through for his own enrichment. The defense is playing The "rich guy doesn't need this stuff" card. They think that the jurors will buy this; after all, it seems logical. However, it ain't about the money for these kinds of people, the mega-rich in politics. It is about the power. They want influence and the "respect" of those in political positions. Being rich holds no real cache; There are tons of rich people around. Rezko wants to control the state. It gives his life meaning. He wants a legacy. I have seen this up close, one of the perks of my job. In the famous words of Tony Montana. "First, joo get the money, then, joo get the power, then, joo get the woman." Same here in Illinois...except the part about "the woman." For the whole package, see Scott Fawell.

Most of all, it is a trial about Blagoevich. Although he is not charged, it is a tale of how this guy got elected and what he truly is all about. I am fascinated with this administration, maybe the most corrupt, morally vacant and ineffective in Illinois history. The idea that Republicans may have contributed more money to Blago's campaign than his own party is astonishing. The bottom line is "Pay for Play" politics at its worst. Rod makes George Ryan look like Thomas Jefferson. At least George could get a budget passed and pay our bills on time. Bush and Blagoevich. If this isn't enough to get voters off their ass and do something, nothing will suffice. I may go over and catch a few days of this sucker.

By the way, if Rod doesn't want to live in the mansion in Springfield, I know a family of six who are feeling a little squeezed.

Sampson Has Head Shaved.

2008-02-23T06:42:00.000-08:00

Kelvin Sampson is no longer head basketball coach at Indiana University. The school gives him $750,000 to go quietly. Blood-Hush Money. That's some lesson for the undergrads. Lie, cheat and steal, then, get 3/4 of a million to go away. Who says crime doesn't pay? Or at least, NCAA violation-type crime.

Some world in which I get to raise my four kids. You get paid hundreds of thousands to leave a job where you get to watch kids play a game and receive a huge salary in the first place. Instead of leaving with remorse and shame, you take your king's ransom and sit on your ass until ESPN comes calling and offers you a lot of money to talk about watching kids play a game. Stay in school and don't use drugs.

How do you instill in your own children that being honest and doing the right thing are the honorable qualities to possess? All you see is people cutting corners and working the angles to get that money. I just keep on keepin' on. It's a daily mantra around this house,"get the grades and be a good person." Follow the ultimate commandment, "Love thy neighbor as thyself." That statement guides my every decision. At least, I think about that during the decision-making process. You know what the right thing is to do, so do it. I say this to my kids over and over. I hope it sinks in. I hope they are good people. I hope they can take care of themselves someday. As Red says in Shawshank, "I hope."

From my dismal view on the world to my dismal view of NFL football in Chicago. I am keeping the tickets for another season. I do enjoy a couple games with the girls and my good, tall and slender friend, Kevin. The Bears have decided not to give Bernard Berrian $7.8 million under the franchise tag. That's fine. You don't overpay for non-#1 receivers. BB is no number 1 receiver. The money should be spent on Lance Briggs. Let's go get him boys. His play speaks for itself. He is an elite OLB who thrives in this scheme. He is worth the big contract.

The Bears should rebuild the O-line by going younger. Do not overspend for an older free agent OL. Especially a guard, aka Alan Faneca. I don't understand the desire to sign a grizzled veteran that is refused the big salary by his present team. Maybe that team knows something about the guy. The free agents du jour will be old and overpriced. We have got that already. Our GM has dumped some dead weight salary already. Let's avoid stocking up on some more. The Bears have to call it what it is, major offensive rebuilding. There are tackles and receivers in this draft. Go get some "need" players. And keep dumping that dead weight.

That brings me to the scouting combine. The annual NFL SAT test. It is the most ridiculous waste of time in sports. A player can prepare for this test in a Stanley Kaplan-athletic preparation course. You know which drills will be required ahead of time. In essence, you have the questions that are on the test. The players are trained to perform those tests for months. Then, teams evaluate the performance on the tests. The flaw: none of these tests have anything to do with playing FOOTBALL.

Every year some teams will draft a player in a very high slot based on his results of the running and jumping performed at the combine even though the player did nothing, and I mean nothing, on the college football field. Inevitably, those players get money that they richly don't deserve and become busts. Other players who can flat out play the game will be devalued, drafted later than they should be, and will be subsequently underpaid because they don't run around the cones fast enough. Those players come into the league with a huge chip on their shoulder, having something to prove. Because they are very good FOOTBALL players already, they crack the starting lineup as rookies, perform well throughout their career and spend the second week of every February in Hawaii. Poi for everyone. Mahalo!

I think its warm there. MMMM, warm.

A Big Green Pie...to Go.

2008-02-16T06:04:00.000-08:00

A couple of years ago, the NFL owners and Player's Union avoided labor turmoil by agreeing to a new collective bargaining agreement. The players did well in this negotiation, carving out an increase in their share of total revenue. Some owners, however, felt that they gave the players too much dough and loudly voiced their displeasure. Of course, we feel sorry for them because they can't horde their extra millions at the expense of the players who chop years off of their lives to entertain us.

One provision in this agreement haunted the recent Super Bowl festivities. The owners can opt out of this contract for the 2009 season. That would force everyone back to the bargaining table. This is the talk around the NFL. This is bad. The owners want their money back while the players are exposing their rear ends for a kiss. Essentially, 2009 will be the last year with a salary cap and 2010 will be an uncapped year. In short, it means possible work stoppage...NO football.

The owners will take the heat and rightly so. This is a profitable, multi-billion dollar industry. No one is going out of business or losing money here. They are just greedy. The result of this stance will be that the players will decertify their union and strike. It also means that if they complete an uncapped year, the salary cap will be gone, forever. The players would never agree to bring it back. This ain't hockey, bitch. This would be death to the owners and would officially revoke the NFL's title as the best-maintained business model in all of sports.

What it means for me is very simple. Any work stoppage or NO football and I am out. For good, for life. No tickets, no games, no more Bears. I did it for baseball, and I will do it in football. Fuck these assholes. I will not tolerate another football strike, like 1982 and 1987. I cannot believe that anyone could be this stupid. I choose not to enable these idiots. I am sure they won't miss me. Everyone will come back. They're wrong to do that, but they will.

As for me, they play football over here at North Central College, Naperville North High School and at various colleges and universities around the country. I will watch plenty of football, just not the pro kind.

And you what? I won't miss it.

Win and Win Pretty.

2008-02-14T10:10:00.000-08:00

Indiana University basketball coach, Kelvin Sampson broke the rules...again. He is a rouge cheater who has no respect for the integrity of his program. He would rather flaunt the rules, ignore the NCAA sanctions imposed upon him and do whatever it takes to recruit players in order to win basketball games. He is single-handedly tarnishing Indiana's storied and glorious basketball history. Simply put, he is a scumbag.

Now you can say that he is no different than most Division 1 athletic coaches, at least, football and basketball coaches. That argument doesn't resonate with me. Just because those sports may be scummy and some of the coaches are scummy does not exonorate those who scuzz out to keep up with the Joneses. If you are a crook, you're a crook. There is no "Scum" Scale to rate these jerkoffs. They all suck.

Bruce Weber, the coach of my favorite team, the Fighting Illini, is an excellent basketball coach, and he is a good man. He is the anti-Sampson. The problem is that he is not recruiting enough talented players. Sometimes, I wonder if winning at the D1 level is worth getting in bed with these Scum-coaches. That is the bottom line, right? Winning? No one belives the mandate at D1 is education, do they?

My problem is that I love the University of Illinois. Rather, I love being a fan of Fighting Illini basketball and football. Especially, the basketball. I did not attend school there. In fact, I ruled it out because it was too big, and I was intimidated by its size. However, since I was a little kid, I rooted for the Illini hoop team. I believe that the U of I basketball program has a great and interesting history. They also win. At least they have a history of winning. Recently, they won quite often, culminating in an appearence in the NCAA championship game. This season, my Illini are losing. Losing ugly, losing at home, losing games that they could and should win. And I hate it.

The big story this past recruiting season was the defection of super-scorer Eric Gordon from his verbal commitment to Illinois to the ScuzzySampson and Indiana. A lot of name calling and accusations were flung at Indiana about Gordon's change of heart. This is a common occurence in big time hoops. I was sad because Gordon can score and score easily which is the one major flaw in this year's Illini. With Gordon, Illinois wins 20 games and are a lock for the tourney. But Gordon wanted Indiana; so be it. I let it go. But I want Weber to recruit and land these types of players. I am starting to resent his inability to land top high schoolers. I can't believe that some kids would play for such idiots like Kelvin Sampson. Most of all, I want to win.

When I get this frustrated, I ask the question. Would I tolerate a Sampson for the wins? The answer is, No. Fuck No. The ends does not justify the means. Not now, not ever. There is no free lunch. As Coach Ditka says, in basketball and in life, at some point, you have to pay. The fact that Indiana fans had to have this turd forced into their lives by some goofy Athletic Director is unfortunate. Now, they should run him out on top of his free Escalade. I am proud of Bruce Weber, the program and his work ethic. I will take him any day over Kelvin Sampson, recruiting be damned.

But Bruce, no more losing, O.K.? I am only human.

Beaten Men

2008-02-04T12:31:00.000-08:00

When I watched some of the highlights from last night's Super Bowl, I realized just how badly the Patriot Offensive line was beaten. Folks, they got their asses kicked. That was the difference in the game. The Giant front-four was ferocious and relentless, while the Patriots o-lineman were like lambs at the slaughter. The Giants broke down their technique and took their confidence. At the snap, the Pats would retreat too deep, their heads would drop, the roller skates came on, and they were not aggressive. It was a a clinic on every mistake an o-lineman can make. The Giants front-four, Strahan, Tuck and company were shot out of the cannon. It was their effort and intensity that caused the Pats O-line to make like the Bears O-line. Crappy. After the first line of attack caused the chaos, the lone blitzer would be on Brady immediately. Alternatively, a D-lineman would break through the blocker and hit Brady before or after the ball was released. The final insult was the jaw shot delivered to Brady by Alford during the Pats last possession. I will watch this game again and soak up the blood-letting. "Katie, Bar the Door!" Playing in Boston turns you into a sissy...right Colleen?

Here we go. It has been recently written in Pro Football Weekly, that upon further review of film, Bernard Berrian's shoddy route running was the cause of much of Rex Grossman's inefficient play. This comment had to have been leaked from the Bears' camp. This is the beginning of the re-signing of Rex. The Bears will offer him a reduced contract and let him compete for the job. Grossman will take the offer. One, it will be as good or better than anything he will get offered elsewhere. Two, he believes that he can beat out the present QB's. Third, he knows the system and does not want to start over. And finally, he knows the Bears won't bring in someone who is clearly superior. They may draft a QB, but not high enough so Lovie feels he has to hand the rookie the keys to the Yugo, otherwise known as the Bears offense.

This is very disturbing. The Bears need to overhaul this offense completely. I start with the O-line. (See above) I realize that QB is not the biggest problem, but the position does need some performance-based leadership. Rex can't perform, at least not consistently. No better way to start fresh than to cut ties with Roller-coaster Rex. Yet, the Bears will do the frugal thing. Name all the real contenders in the league, and you can name a money QB. I have fought this theory in the past. Today, I'm in for life. Gotta get that talent behind the center.

My Favorite Sports Movie...No, I'm Not a Queer.

2008-01-24T18:42:00.000-08:00

I have seen every sports-related movie ever made. At least, all the sports movies worth taking a look at. I exclude the last three movies starring "The Rock." If I have to explain why, well, you can stop reading now.

Most sports movies seriously blow. There is really nothing better than true sporting events viewed as they happen. The best reality TV ever. However, there are a few sports movies that are truly worthy of multiple sittings. The first Rocky, Hoosiers, North Dallas Forty, Miracle are some that come to the forefront. The Longest Yard and Bad News Bears qualify. The originals, not the recent remakes. They wouldn't make a film like the original Bad News Bears today. Maybe the most politically incorrect movie ever made. Hilarious.

My favorite sports movie is Chariots of Fire. Many movie buffs still rail that Chariots beat out Raiders of the Lost Ark for the Best Picture Oscar in 1981. Boo hoo. Chariots tells the story of two members of the 1924 British Olympic team. Two runners, Harold Abrahams and Eric Lidell. It is a tale of personalities, an obsessed Abrahams and the driven Lidell. It has everything that is great about sports, effort, competition, sacrifice, failure, glory and redemption. For my purposes, there is a character, Aubrey Montague, that reminds me of myself, of what I am and wanted to be and most importantly, what I never could be.

It is an inspirational movie and really, it's not boring at all. I know you think it is, but it's not. It always inspires me to achieve. "Where does one find the strength to see the race through to it's end? From within."

I Am Yelling AT YOU!!! Watch the Playoffs.

2008-01-12T05:21:00.000-08:00

I hate the week long pre-hash of the upcoming slate of games. You have these big ESPN talking heads screaming their predictions and prognostications at you as if they are saying, "If you don't believe what I say, you are a fucking idiot." These are mostly sportswriters who are slumming on TV for the extra cash. Everyone wants to be on TV and get "paid." How tiresome. They don't know shit, and the only view of their mugs we should be subjected to is the photo attached to their byline in their columns that you wouldn't even read on the toilet. So there.

The other waste of my prized listening time is the weekly "guarantee of victory" prediction with the follow-up 1100 questions to the player who said "I guarantee a win on Sunday." Who really thinks that this actually matters? It did the first time someone said it. Joe Namath in 1968. And he really didn't say it. What he said was, in summary, we will take the field on Super Bowl Sunday believing that we will win. Find me a player who doesn't believe that when they take the field. If you don't believe that, well, you leave the field on a flat-bed cart. This is the biggest red herring in the sports media. I find myself watching less and less ESPN. Yes, this is a bad thing.

Only a few games left for this football season. Hopefully, they will live up to all of the loud hype.

To Season Ticket or Not to Season Ticket...a Bear Question

2008-01-12T04:45:00.000-08:00

Should I get 2008 season tickets? I am struggling with the decision. I really don't want to spend the money on them. I would rather put it toward a vacation with the family. I really cannot get inspired to drop the $1100 on this franchise. The Bears ownership is so concerned about the bottom line; why shouldn't I be? In truth, I kind of broke even by selling this season's tickets at inflated prices. But the thought of supporting Lovie Smith in any way gives me a dull ache behind my eyes.

It is not about the Bears spending money. It is about lousy personnel decisions. Spend the right amount of money on good players. You don't have to chase after the "free-agent dujour." How about not overspending for your lousy coach? How about creating competition at every position? How about...? Oh, screw it.

All I ever wanted in the realm of pro sports was to have Bears season tickets. Now that I have had them for a few years, I find myself not wanting to go to Soldier Field. It is not all that much fun, really. There is an obnoxious faction of attendees, with the boozing and all. Not really a place for the kids, and I have a lot of those. So, if I cannot be with my family, I don't enjoy being gone so long on a weekend day. In fact, watching the game live is difficult. Those TV timeouts are much easier to deal with at home. There is already enough down time in the game of football. Standing through the constant stoppages, with no actual snap for stretches at a time is aggravating. Better to be at home, with bathroom proximity, no lines (most of the time) and reasonably priced food and drink. Plus, I enjoy having the family watch with me, for the 3 or 4 plays that they watch with me.

I am talking myself into this. Let's keep going. Another reason to drop is the lack of consistent winning with this team. We have a good year, then two or three bad years. That does not inspire me. I have no faith in the top guys here. I would rather go to a North Central game. Three straight years in the playoffs. Now that gets me motivated. Ticket prices for old NC are $5. It is about the football. I can watch my friends coach a good high school team on Friday night. I can take a short trip to see one of my Knox roommates coach in the NFL. I can actually root for someone I know. I'm getting my roll on.

The only reason to keep them tickets is for the playoffs. Here, however, you are buying at least 3 seasons worth of tickets for one home playoff game...maybe. Suze Orman would stamp a big "DENIED" on my forehead with that logic. As for my decision, I won't see that bill for a little while. This year, they better wait until the last possible minute. My heart's not in it.

Alas, another season has ended. (I just wanted to use the word "Alas")

2008-01-01T07:44:00.000-08:00

I am not melancholy about the end to the Bears' season. It was painful to watch. There will be a time to contemplate the future, not today. I just know that the Bears organization is not a dynamic or exciting group. I know that we can't expect great things from this franchise year in and year out. If we have a good season, it is a fluke. That is how it has been since the end of the Ditka era. The Bears are afraid to have that kind of personality running the team again.

It was a great era, the Ditka era. He expected to win and that rubbed off on the whole city. But I knew it was time for him to go, when he was fired. I never thought that I would miss him so much. Hiring Ditka was George Halas' last great move on this earth. Before that, Halas had a great move in 1943. We need to move in some modern ownership. And while I'm at it, I also need to win the Powerball twice in one month. Cynical, but true.

Today, we celebrate college football. Specifically, the Illini play in the Rose Bowl against the highly-favored USC Trojans. You heard it here, Illinois will win. I just have a feeling. That's about all I have. So, quite possibly, I could be eating this post in 12 hours. It is much more fun to feel good and be optimistic, however. It is a new year, full of promise. Let's look forward to something. Plus, USC's quarterback is named "Booty." This has to bode well for the Orange and Blue.

I am ready to grind out another year. There is no surprise as to what is ahead for 2008. I realize that this doesn't sound very exciting, but raising and supporting a family is hard work. I take joy in the effort. I am not the type of person that waits around with a hand out, looking for a windfall. I need to earn my success in all aspects of my life, as a husband, a father and a provider. I want to do my best every day. It is a constant responsibility. The reward is the devotion and love I receive from my family. That feels great. It makes me want to live forever.

A Big Pile of Humbug

2007-12-20T09:11:00.000-08:00

I am not a "Christmas Cheer" person. It is a bunch of contrived and insincere bullshit. We can't be nice to others the other 11 months of the year? Really, are people kinder to each other during the Christmas season? No, they run each other over and display no patience with their fellow man as they prowl the malls looking for holiday swag. How jolly. It is a mad rush to get to a day of consumption. U.S.A. !!!

Merry Christmas to the Atlanta Falcons and the Arkansas Razorback football players. Rookie Falcon head coach, Bobby Petrino, pulls a "duck" and leaves the franchise with three games left and doesn't have the balls to face the players and tell them. A "duck" is the move you make at a bar, when you want to get out of there and one guy keeps calling you a "pussy" and keeps buying rounds. You go to the bathroom and sneak out the back door without saying goodbye. It's a weenie move. Man up and tell your boys that you are cutting out. Really.

Anyway, this bag of crap leaves his team because he can't hack it and runs back to college. Now, the poor Arkansas football players, who can't choose their coach, are stuck with this low-life. One recruit withdrew his commitment and told the truth; He couldn't play for a guy who was so obviously untrustworthy. Good for him. Shame on the Arkansas AD for enabling this kind of behavior and subjecting young men to this mercenary asshole.

Petrino made $5 million with the Falcons and will make 3 million instead with Arkansas. With this kind of money, these coaches could give a care. The man has no honor, no sense of responsibility, no commitment and has no qualities of a real man. Petrino has the nerve to tell the media that he doesn't want to "dwell on the past," but wants to "look to the future." Of course he does. That serves his interests and allows him to avoid looking in the mirror. To top it all off, he acts like a real clown at the Arkansas press conference, one day after ass-reaming the NFL Falcons, by doing the Razorback "SOOEY PIG" cheer with a big "I just got paroled" smile on his face. If I was an Atlanta player, I would hunt Petrino down, slap in the face and tell him, as Don Corleone told Johnny Fontaine, "You can ACT LIKE A MAN!!!" How can this guy look at his children with any shred of self-respect.

Merry Christmas to Bear fans everywhere. What did Santa Papa Bear get us this year? A coach who is so arrogant and stupid that he can't take media questions about his sorry-ass team. Lovie needs to start telling the truth. He owes it to Bear fans. We buy the tickets; we allow him to make a living coaching a game; we help pay his salary. Maybe Lovie doesn't feel the "media" is entitled to know why Greg Olsen is not on the field, but I am entitled to know. They won't let me ask the questions to Lovie, so the writers do. Answer the questions, honestly. It's football not national security. I am really sick of this guy. Is this obvious?

Forgive my Grinchy frown. Christmas to me is about the five faces I see every morning. It is about the people I love and respect outside my four walls. It is about the birth of a savior, a faith in the goodness of man and a hope of heaven. To me, that is a daily reflection. In my world, everyday is Christmas.

This Is What I'm Talking About...No, It's Not the Bears.

2007-12-04T08:32:00.000-08:00

If you caught the Monday Night tilt between the Patriots and Ravens, you saw professional football at its best. The great thing about the Pats quest to go undefeated is watching their opponents elevate their play and effort to the highest level. The Ravens played their asses off. The Pats fought for their 12-0 lives. It was not about money last night. It was about pride. It was about beating and being the best. It was the finest football players in the world playing at their peak. You don't see this kind of game during the regular season very often. Lately, the Pats are getting to play in these games. I have said it before and will say it again, watch this team.

That being said, the Ravens are whining like bitches. "The refs stole the game." Bullshit. I love it when the losing player says, "You can't call a penalty on fourth down or in the fourth quarter. Let the players decide it on the field." Well, that is fine, unless you actually commit a penalty that gives you an unfair advantage on fourth down or in the fourth quarter. The Ravens DB held the Pats receiver on fourth down with the game on the line. It was clear. He held him. The ref is supposed to eat the flag? How is that fair? You don't get to cheat because it is fourth down with the game on the line. The Ravens' complaints diminish what I considered a tremendous game on their part. They had their chances with the ball. They couldn't get it done. Look in the mirror, lads.

After a third down hold by New England forcing a punt late in the game, Patriot safety Rodney Harrison walked past the Ravens bench and talked some smack. This caused Ravens Coach Brian Billick to make three "kissing-smooch" faces to Harrison. This was hilarious on multiple levels. First of all, this game was so fierce, all professionalism was thrown out the window. This was a street fight. Good Times. More importantly, it highlighted the fact that Billick has no lips. Can a man with no lips effectively perform the "kiss-smooch" face? Did Harrison win the confrontation because of Billick's liplessness? We don't even know what Harrison said to provoke the "kisses." Does Billick maintain credibility without lips? It is like having the Larry Linville "Frank Burns" character from M.A.S.H as your head coach. Rod Blagoevich has no lips. This does not bode well for Billick.

Just Look Away. It Only Hurts for a Second.

2007-11-21T05:14:00.000-08:00

People always come up to me and ask "How can you get excited and root for these Bears when they play like this." OK, no one really comes up to me, ever, and asks me about the Bears. I think I scare people a little. The answer is "I don't stay excited." I am easily able to lose interest in a pathetic Bear team. I can look at the talent, the coaching and be objective in my fandom. I am grounded in reality when it comes to the Bears. I will watch every game despite their record. But my love of football does not rest solely on the Bears. I love sports and competition. That is what inspires me and that has been true since I was a little fan.

When I was a kid, if I wasn't playing sports, I was watching sports or reading about sports. I was always playing ball outside with my friends. I could always find a game or get one going. I watched every sport I could find on the 6 channels we used to get back in the 70's and 80's. When ESPN was born, I was there. I have read every decent sports book ever written. That was fanaticism. My roommate in college and I just talked about this same thing, how sports-obsessed we were. He is one of my best friends. That is the foundation of our relationship. It is always our shared experiences at games. That is where it all gets done. We talk about our lives, dreams, goals, setbacks and accomplishments while either at a game or watching the game or calling to talk about the game. It is what my father and I always shared until the end. It was one of my great accomplishments in life to take my dad to great games and get great seats. I promised myself I would do that. I also told him how much it meant for me to do that with him. The few people that I consider my best friends are sports fanatics. It is not a long list of people, but it is a long list of games.

As I have gotten older, my sports obsession has waned. I have narrowed the field tremendously. Football season and college basketball until March Madness and then I go on hiatus. I have dropped the baseball and the Australian Rules football. My attachment to a particular player is all but gone. It is the pure competition that keeps me interested, that and a chance to see a game with my friends. I could be in the endzone at Montini, the visiting fans section in Gainesville, up and in the corner for the Illini comeback to go to the Final Four (remember that one), high up on Rocky Top or at the Bears NFC championship game with my new sports buddy, and I can feel like a kid for just a few hours. A family of four and a law practice means I can't act like a kid, but I can pretend.

Stop. Hey. What's That Sound? It's Cedric Benson Falling Down.

2007-11-16T08:53:00.000-08:00

I have heard enough talk about this pathetic Bear rushing attack to last a lifetime. It is a very simple issue. The guy that they hand the ball won't run hard through the line of scrimmage. I will be the first one to tell you that the Bears O-line is overrated. But they are not "worst in the league" bad. Cedric Benson is that bad. Just watch him stop at the line of scrimmage or tip-toe to the blocking. It is sickening. He also has this delusion that he can go sideways like Barry Sanders. Uh, no, you cannot. On top of it all, he hasn't broken a tackle all year. It infuriates me that Lovie Smith will not admit that they can't get it done with Benson. It makes me realize how much rebuilding is necessary. I am disheartened.

Another problem is this Tommy Harris. He is very undisciplined and, this really hurts to say, selfish. It starts with that jumping the snap count stuff that he pulled early this year. The Bear coaches got that nonsense under control. But now he is not doing his job. He is over penetrating, looking for stats and sacks, and that makes the D vulnerable to the run. I have been watching this for weeks, and hoped it was a desperate effort to make something good happen. Now, I see it as selfish. He is a two gap control tackle. He sack numbers should not be high. They are not needed in this scheme. Also, Mark Anderson should only be playing on passing downs. He over penetrates on every play. I think Alex Brown is getting the shaft. He is a more consistent run defender. He is a good teammate; he does his job. It kills me that Alfonso Boone is having a great year in Kansas City. This is another example of the incompetence of our player evaluation. I believe that Lovie is now more involved with the personnel decisions. This is the result. Let's let Jerry Angelo run that show. I would not be surprised to hear this leak out.

Can we permanently acknowledge that we suck on offense and blow this thing up? I did enjoy seeing the return of the deep ball to Berrian. The Raider game was a stinker. Unwatchable. Seattle is solid and efficient. Hopefully, a loss will stop any and I mean ANY talk of playoffs. If this Bear team makes the playoffs, the NFL should disband for one year, reduce the number of teams, and start over in 2009 with a better product. This parity bullshit is making for bad football. There are 4 teams playing good football on a consistent basis. The rest are crap. The beat down that the Patriots are putting on the league exposes the crap. It really is getting too complicated. More play, less think. Who wants these idiots thinking anyway?

Bears Not Needed to Induce Labor

2007-11-09T08:38:00.000-08:00

No need to fall back on the child-birth last resort, watching the 2007 Bears to kick start Kathleen's contractions. With the past bye week, the baby was allowed to remain in utero for another few days. It's Friday, November 9, 2007, and it looks like the baby is coming today. Hopefully, we will be watching the Bears/Raiders game at home, suffering as a family.

Ruben Brown, offensive guard emeritus, has been placed on the DL and is lost for the season. Good riddance. He lowers the team's average age a whole year just by his removal from the roster.

Pro Football Weekly (I am a subscriber) rips Lovie Smith in this week's issue. The most compelling point made is that Lovie sucks at player evaluation. I agree. He has to get out of the player personnel business and focus solely on coaching. Standing pat on offense this past off-season was a major blunder. You saw this coming. He needs to show a little less loyalty to unproductive players. A sense of urgency is needed in that locker room. That and a fear of losing your job. See the work product of Jimmy Johnson and Bill Belichick. When money is involved, fear can be extremely motivating.

If the Bears can get Michael Turner (RB-San Diego) in free agency after this season, it will be a good off-season. We need him, bad. They need to make a strong push for him. I also see Donovan McNabb popping up as a potential future Bear. I am O.K. with that as long as the price is not out of control. There was also mention of J.P. Losman. Noooooo! Run for the hills. I have three words for that guy. Rex Grossman Lite.

If the Bears are serious about getting better, we should see Kyle Orton very soon. Remember, Orton has started in the League and has won some games. After a few years on the sideline, I am curios to see what he has got. No harm in trying. Really, where are we going with this season.

I watched the replay of the Adrian Peterson record-shattering rushing game vs. San Diego. Mind you, AP is the goods. Strength and speed to burn, runs hard, plays behind his pads and has the vision all great backs have. Also, San Diego's run defense is no pushover. But folks, that team blocked superbly. The line, receivers and tight end put on a clinic. They should print copies of that tape and sell it to coaches because that was zone blocking done to perfection. Stay with those blocks, Old Bears.

Off to the Hospital. New Bears fan coming. Some father I am, subjecting my daughter to a lifetime of futile fandom. Well, why should she get to be happy?

A Dollop of WhipCream on a Crap Sundae

2007-10-26T09:43:00.000-07:00

I didn't come up with the caption above, but I like it. It sums up how I feel about anything good that the Bears accomplish this season. We are getting no closer to a championship team. In fact, we are moving further away from a Super Bowl. It is time to find out who can play at the highest level. If you can't, then beat it.

I hate the survival instinct of NFL coaches. They have to win to save their jobs. So as a result, they try to win "right now" as opposed to doing what is best for the future. As a fan, I could care less about these coaches. If we are not good enough to win the Super Bowl this year, I don't care if we scrape together 8 or 9 wins and lose a playoff game. I want to do whatever it takes to get better. If Benson sucks, don't play him and put in someone or find someone who can. Let's find out if Kyle Orton can play. Play some rookies and backups. Make this season worthwhile instead of hitting up fans for worthless playoff tickets .

Speaking of "who can't," Cedric Benson tops the list. I would love to continue to delude myself into believing that the "lightswitch" will soon be flipped on, but really, I would be wasting energy. He cannot do this NFL running back thing. He is a bust. We wasted a first round draft pick on this load. Lovie still wants us to buy his theory that we are a running team. How much more of this coach can we stand? My boys at FOOTBALL OUTSIDERS.COM have the Bears rush offense DEAD LAST! (Wow, caps and excessive punctuation) So, we must be a passing team because our pass offense is 27th out of 32 teams. Why doesn't Lovie just tell us that we actually have won all 7 games. Maybe we'll believe that too. Fuckin' lying bastard. It's like passing a kidney stone, writing this.

I have not been to a game since Dallas, and I'm not going back this year. I can't sit out there, frustrated, with all that is going on at home and at work. It is a long day. Better to be home and shut off the TV if necessary. I want the comfort of home while I suffer. Wouldn't we all like to die in our own beds with our loved ones by our side? Is this too extreme of an example?

I will be tailgating in my driveway this Sunday. Sunny and temps in the 50's. I will roll out the big Weber, play some bags with the girls and fire up some brats and burgers. Maybe I can get the cable hooked up and watch the game outside. I have always wanted to do this. Big aspirations, I know. Also, I am aware that some may wonder how I can celebrate a Bears Sunday after my increasingly negative comments and outlook. That's the M.O. of an addict, enthused about the next fix yet certain to rage against the subsequent crash. At least the grill never disappoints.

Yeah, I've Been Watching.

2007-10-17T19:14:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile; I'm busy with life. Just closed out a frustrating 6th grade football season with two straight wins. Final record 2-6. Glad it's over. Also, I just found out that I have a new daughter coming in 26 days, and, you will love this, I am a lawyer. Back to work, old man. College and weddings and Bears.

I watched the Bears play one great defensive half of football and steal a win in Green Bay. Possible season saver. Then, an absolute disgraceful performance against Minnesota...quoting Michael Corleone..."IN MY HOME! WHERE MY WIFE SLEEPS, WHERE MY CHILDREN PLAY WITH THEIR TOYS!" The Bears defense must return the title of "formidable defense." As my Jewish buddy says, "They are an ashande to the goyim." That means "they suck." I can't even talk about this, I will break out in hives.

I have been in this situation before. By situation, I mean where the season is over by week 7. These are the Chicago Bears; lousy seasons are not rare. That is when you must find the college game, or even better, high school football. If you feed the addiction by overdosing on ballgames Friday night and Saturday, you can actually go to the mall, shop, miss the Bears game, avoid the gut-punch fallout after they play like crap, and actually enjoy a Sunday in autumn. Much easier to do if you live downtown-lots to do. In WESTBURBIA, it's the mall.

As for this week, wait who do they play, oh yeah, Philly at Philly. By the way, the cheesesteak, not overrated. The Eagles are reeling. Nothing like a late afternoon with Lovie to get them healthy. That's pessimistic, but I am pissed. A rookie running back sets an all-time rushing record against a Bears defense that supposedly turned the corner. Our running back can't stop slamming into the backs of his own lineman. We pay him millions to sniff their asses. Where is that hydrocortisone cream? I am itchy.

This Squeeky Wheel Gets No Griese

2007-10-02T08:42:00.000-07:00

I'm not surprised by Sunday's loss. I am dizzy from the slew of injuries. That's the NFL, folks. I wish some more offensive players would get injured or, spontaneously combust so that Jerry Angelo and the Muffin would start beating the bushes for some offensive talent. I warned you about this quarterback thing. It is a band-aid on a severed aorta. Blood everywhere. We ignored the offense all off-season, and now, it is biting us in the ass. Normally, I take no solace in another's misery when attempting to soothe my wounds. Alas, this is a new day, season, miserable situation. I could be a Charger fan. They fire their coach after a 14-2 season. They hire a coach with a losing record. They have the best running back in football. Everyone is more relaxed and comfortable. They are planning for a trip to Arizona for SB42. WHAM!! They are 1-3 and staring into the abyss (Pats and Colts). Lost at home to the CHIEF. At least they have great weather. Shit, that would make THERE better than HERE. I am not feeling well again. Time to move on.

I also take some solace in the knowledge that no one is beating the Pats or the Colts. You have to watch the Patriots any time they are on the tube. I have not seen such domination since, well, hmmmm, the Patriots of 2003-2004. More dominant than that group, at least offensively. Great players, great coaches, great management, great ownership, you getting the picture. Not great weather, however.

I tried the Portillo's chocolate shake. I should say, "I attempted to try the Portillo's chocolate shake." It did not go over so well. I drove with Maggie to the Portillo's on Ogden at 7:30 p.m. on Saturday. The drive-thru was jammed, so we decided to go inside. There were 1,500 people in there. No wonder why Americans are so fat; you can't eat dinner, especially that food, so late at night. Unless they are hitting the treadmill later that evening, that gut bomb is with you until the a.m. I am sure they are removing the buns and fries. Nevertheless, we ordered two small chocolate milkshakes and proceeded to weave through the sea of humanity to await our dessert. We waited and waited. After Maggie and I solved several domestic policy problems for the Bush administration, our shakes arrived. Only they were "Chocolate Cake Shakes." Yes, that's right, and they tasted as bad as you are now imagining. No way was I going back into that quagmire of Naper-villains; I just wanted out. Anyway, their shakes come out of a dispenser which automatically eliminates Portillo's as a contender. Oberweiss Forever.

Hey Lovie, I'm Not Booking a Trip to Arizona in February

2007-09-25T18:26:00.000-07:00

The Post-Rex era begins in earnest. That is what the people and, most likely, the Bears players wanted. I wanted it too, but that doesn't mean that I feel good about it. In fact, I am upset and a little nauseated. The fact that this move to Griese had to happen is a bad thing for my team. Bad in many ways.

1. We spent a first round draft pick and paid for a franchise quarterback. The pick has busted. We have wasted five years on this guy, declining to develop another young QB and now our franchise is as well off as a Krispy Kream franchise. No value. Rex will be gone before June 1, 2008. Sayonara.

2. The "Rexplacement" will now highlight, to all you non-stop Rex-bashers, the lack of talent on this offense. Let's face it, Lovie and Angelo rolled the same beat up Ford out to camp, didn't give it a tune-up, threw a fresh coat of paint on it (Hester?) and tried to sell it to us as a new, sexy BMW. They stink. The QB is only one of the stinkees. The line cannot block, the receivers cannot get open nor catch and the backs are slow and fumble-prone. I am visualizing the next "wasted first-round draft pick blog entry" AKA "Cedric the Unentertaining." The horror.

3. It took so long to get to this finger-in-the-dike benching that we have practically killed our once stout and proud defense. Six starters are down because that offense could not stay on the field. Griese will move the chains, get some positive field position and protect the ball. Can he get us points? With what we have left on D, those poor slobs are going to get scored upon. We have to score on offense. I am not taking the over.

4. We are not going back to the Super Bowl. We will have to fight for the NFC North. We will not have a home playoff game. I hate writing this stuff, but it's true.

We have not made a halftime adjustment, ever. The one great second half the Bears have played under the current administration was in the NFC title game. The players responded to the Reggie Bush taunt and beat the Saints ass in the fourth quarter. Name me one other game where the Bears outplayed the opponent in the second half. I'm still waiting.

I hate Smith and Turner. They decided that it was O.K. to go with this pile of crap. They cannot evaluate offensive talent. If you cheered for another team, what player on this offense would you love to have? See what I mean? I only say this because I want you to understand...this benching is a season killer. And I want you to be as sick about it as I am.

The True Test

2007-09-20T09:37:00.000-07:00

A true athlete or competitor knows when the crucial moment of a game or a season is upon them. It is a moment when one understands that the next play or minute will decide the outcome of the contest. If they don't know or realize the moment, they will lose. On Sunday, the Bears have such a moment. The Dallas game will expose what kind of team that we have. When you watch this game understand that you are watching a season-defining game. It will truly be a revealing night.

This is also a season-defining tailgate for me. The pressure is palpable. I will not be attending many games this season. I also will not be cooking with the kind of motivation that I will have on Sunday. I aim to please my guests with a full yet diverse menu. I promise I will not "Bad Rex" this opportunity to grill.

If you are watching on television, may I suggest a "Rex" drinking game. Every time the announcers mention Grossman and the reference is not in regard to a play that is happening or has just happened, you must drink. In preperation for this game, please purchase a large amount of your favorite alcoholic beverage and prepare to use a sick day on Monday. You think the guy hung a dog or something. He is just a lousy football player.

As predicted, Tank Johnson got a job in the NFL. This should be no suprise because Leonard Little always had a job, and he killed a human being. The only way to be banned from the league is to bet on another player killing more than one human being while that player is using a banned substance.

Matriculate the Ball Down the Field, Boys.

2007-09-18T18:48:00.000-07:00

The late, great Hank Stram, offensive innovator par excellence, would have projectile vomited at the offensive display put on at Soldier Chase Bank Oscar Mayer Wiener Field this past Sunday. The Bear and Chief offenses suck lemons. With four minutes remaining and in possession of the football, with a chance to ice the game, The Bears O goes on a 25 second drive. The Bears defensive players are taking up a collection to sign one good offensive player. It is a disgrace. I want to poke a stick in my eye. Can't we keep the defense off the field for a couple of minutes in a row? I am getting stomach cramps just thinking about this.

If you love the Bears, then don't watch the Patriots. It will make you want to walk into oncoming traffic. They are Super-powered. The football in the AFC is really good. The Bears have to do something epic to even attempt to be competitive with the AFC's best. They have the D and the special teams. They also have, in my opinion, a full-fledged quarterback controversy. Better QB play gives us a chance at a Super Bowl. Otherwise, we are conceding that all we can get is a runner-up trophy, again.

I sold my tickets for $70 over face value. The girl that bought them got her money's worth. Devin Hester needs his own theater at Caesar's Palace. The man can put butts in the seats. He is awesome. I have seen him return three kicks for TDs in person. There is no more exhilarating player in the league. 10 seconds of pure adrenaline. Even if he doesn't break one, you hold your breath. He is the best returner that I have ever seen. Watch those potty breaks, you don't want to miss him.

"A $5 Milkshake? That's Just Milk and Ice Cream, Right? Do You Put a Shot of Rum in There?"

2007-09-14T08:22:00.000-07:00

One of my great culinary quests is to find the best chocolate milkshake in the world. I know this is not a complicated search considering the limited ingredients. Charlie Trotter, I am not. However, a chocolate milkshake is my favorite dessert. Thus, the quest. After 30 years of questing, I do have a favorite. I will share my findings with you, my two readers.

First off, I will give a favorable review to a "well-priced" shake. My best bang-for-the-buck chocolate shake goes to Dairy Queen. A small runs about $2.50 and has good chocolate flavor and loses nothing with the soft serve ice cream. Always a solid "cheap eat."

By far, the best chocolate shake belongs to Oberweis. It is expensive, $6 a pop. When ordering this monstrosity, I have a flashback to Pulp Fiction when Vincent Vega is initially incredulous about the price of a milkshake at Jack Rabbit Slim's. (See caption). When I taste the Oberweis shake, Vince and I have the same reaction. "That's a pretty f-ing good milkshake. I don't know if it's worth $6 but it's pretty f-ing good." And it is. And it is HUGE. So, you get your money's worth in volume. In the end, no shake can touch it.

I will add that Potbelly has a good milkshake. They also give you two small butter cookies on the straw. This is the kind of personal touch that moves me. After all, who doesn't need a butter cookie now and then. It makes me feel young. Also, McDonald's has tweaked their shakes in a good way. It is cheap, and if you are in a hurry to consume some calories, you can't beat the drive thru.

Now to the purpose of this blog, the Bears. I am not going to the opener. I am boycotting until they win or until they play a night game against Dallas. I fully expect that the Bears offense will score, and the CHIEF will be vanquished. It doesn't change the fact that:
1. The Coaches call a weeny game against good teams on the road.
2. Lovie Smith lies to us on a daily basis.
3. I have relinquished my seat on the "Rex Grossman Experience" roller-coaster ride.

I came to point number 3 in my usual high-traffic, alone-time on the commute. I listened to "Deepak" Smith drone on about the positives of last Sunday's "puss-out" and realized that Lovie had point number 2ed me on Grossman. He doesn't believe that Grossman can win them a big game. He never did. He really doesn't know if Rex can win them a big game. I then realized that I had just eaten from the tree of knowledge. I realized that I was naked, not literally (arrestable offense), but in my blind allegiance to the man. I am weak like that. Despite the sinking feeling, it is better this way. I can enjoy more college football and the beauty of perfect weather on a fall weekend. Perspective folks, is priceless.

If You Want to Run with the Big Dogs...You Have to Piss on the Big Trees

2007-09-10T08:24:00.000-07:00

Bears 3-Chargers 14

With a night to sleep on it and some a.m. reflection, I will convey my disappointment. When you get an opportunity to play a game against an elite team, you must bring all the ammo in the arsenal. You play to win and in order to do that you must be bold in your planning and dynamic in your execution. I saw that on the defensive side of the ball. On offense, I saw caution and unimaginative play-calling.

The turnovers were costly, and lost them the game. But do you really feel that the Bears played to win on offense? If the turnovers had not happened, did you get the sense that the Bears would go for the kill? I did not. I never get the feeling in a really big matchup that the Bears staff has the confidence to let it all hang out and play to win on offense. The tentative play-calling is a problem. You don't slay the dragon with a dull, small blade. It is a philosophy that does not win championships. You can beat the Lions, Vikings and Packers with this unimaginative style, but it fails against the elite, the Chargers, the Patriots and the Colts.

It is the same feeling I got with the New England game last year. They want to hang around until the end, and maybe they will pull it out. That's weak. Do they really think Rex can pull out a close one at the end? Yesterday, they certainly did not give him the chance to win the game. Many people think that Rex is not that kind of quarterback. The people who really count are the Bears and their coaches. If they think Rex is the guy, then call that kind of game. If not, put in Griese and grind out the wins. Certainly, don't pay Rex for "managing" the game. That is not why you draft a QB in the first round. Either believe in him or let him go.

The defense was awesome. They were on the field way too long in the 2nd half. Note to Ron Turner, when the Chargers Hall of Fame running back, LaDanian Tomlinson was shut down, they let him throw a pass, near the goal line, for a touchdown. That is dynamic. Ron, you get paid to make the adjustments, so adjust. If it's broken, fix it. Or be gone.

Did you all think that the Bears were going to run all over SD? C'mon, they also have an elite defense. There are signs of a problem, though. The offensive line is not that good. I don't understand how the "expert media" gets this so wrong. Olin Kreutz is a player. The rest of those guys are old and more worrisome, slow. That is why the Bears have trouble with the 3-4 defense. Those defenses are fast. The line's heavy feet is why the pass protection is so bad against the good defenses. Couple that slowness with Benson's running style and you see the problem. Cedric shows no vision as a runner; he is all one hole and downhill. I hate to say it, but Thomas Jones made that line look better. He gave the line the comfort of not being perfect. Without that vision, the Cedric running game becomes one dimensional. That being said, AP ran well, quick to the hole and elusive with over 4 yards a carry. Its the fumbles.

The Chargers eliminated the special team threat. If the Chargers are not going to allow Hester to return punts, why didn't the Bears let him return the kickoffs? The defense did not score. They have got to score on offense. At least, they have got to try.

The Bears can make the playoffs in their weak division. That is not what we are looking for. We need to be a great team. This first test for greatness was a failure.

It's Getting Better All the Time.

2007-09-03T13:40:00.000-07:00

I noticed that recently departed, Dtackle Ian Scott, was released by his new team. Just another example of the Bears GM and coaches constantly evaluating their own talent. That is an important part of the salary cap NFL success process. Not only must you evaluate the college players and NFL players on other teams, you must continue to truthfully evaluate your own talent. Bill Belichick is the master at this skill. The Bears did not value Scott at the price he would demand with the injury he was recovering from, so they let him go. Then, they went out and bolstered their depth at the position. The Bears are working within the current system with great success. It makes me feel warm all over.

I am ready for the real game on Sunday. I am bringing the lunch pail along with the Monsters. 11 wins and a home playoff game is the goal. More importantly, they must be a tougher team than last year. Mentally tougher. In order to beat the best on a regular basis, the Bears have to be better than last year right now. Then by Week 17, they must be even better. Not just one guy, all of the guys. Stay healthy, boys.

I'm not pulling any punches this year. Our window is closing with these players. Now is the time. Keep that chip on the shoulder. Arizona in January sounds great. Anything less is unacceptable. I will rip 'em.

On Labor Day, I must grill with charcoal. I have a turkey breast on the big Weber right now. Baked potatoes and corn to follow. Good year for the sweet corn. Reminds me of a tailgate tale. One opener vs. the Lions, I rode with my crew; I had not yet taken the cooking reigns in my own hands. Kevin had brought a good size grill, a larger Smokey Joe, and had put a bag of pre-lit charcoal in the belly of the grill. The bag took up all of the space in the grill. I pulled the bag out to dump in some coals. Kevin's pal, Billy, said, "No, just light the whole bag inside the grill." I protested but to no avail. He lit the bag, and soon, a geyser of flame erupted from the small grill. You couldn't get within 10 feet of that thing. It was like cooking on the sun. That day made me. I took over the tailgating from there on. I also got my first lesson on heat control. Along with some flame-induced eyebrow removal.

I Wish I Was in Dixie.

2007-08-31T11:02:00.000-07:00

I love the South. Not the Southside, but the South. Any chance that I get to travel down below Springfield is worth taking. I mean, they even have sweet tea and great barbecue in southern Illinois. However, I would like to keep going and get deep in the heart of Dixie. That is where my football obsession would be seen as a personality strength.

I have been to three SEC football games, and they put the football-North to shame. Knoxville, Gainesville and Baton Rouge-Tennessee, Florida and LSU, respectively. UT was the best. "Rocky Top" on permanent rotation, orange everywhere, nicest people and kick-ass stadium. I'm going back...someday soon. The fans in all three spots were relentless. As much as I hate Florida, Gator fans are the best. They stand throughout the game, cheer loudly, sing songs, do that stupid "gator chomp", they are the closest thing to English soccer fans as America can provide. LSU was alright. We missed the real tailgating due to our late arrival. I hear the campus is beautiful, but the stadium is overrated. Maybe a night game...hmmm.

They are college football crazy. Being from the North, I am mainly an NFL-Bears guy. However, I will always catch those SEC games on the tube. And pine for those tailgates under the palmetto or pecan trees. I bet there are no itch mites down in football paradise.

As for the last practice game, we got a knee to the groin with an Olsen sprained knee. No need for him to be out there, Love Muffin. Just admit the mistake. This guy is starting to sound like a politician. All I know is that on September 9, they best be ready to play. I will not concede this game because it is on the road and against an AFC power. No excuses, just win, baby.

A Well Attended Practice

2007-08-28T11:04:00.000-07:00

Another full house at Chase Field at Soldier Field at the former site of the Old Soldier Field Stadium for the 3rd practice game. Our Bears scored 31 points in the first half. In the past ten quarters at home over the past three seasons, the Bears have outscored the 49ers, 389-13 or something like that. Also, Nathan Vasher returned a missed field goal 105 yards for a touchdown against the Niners three years ago. That occurred with 20 seconds to go in the first half of that game. Many fans missed that play because they sprinted to the bathroom lines. Some advice: drink less-watch more football.

It was great to be in the south lot for the tailgating. One problem, the parking police put us in front-gating position. This sucks. You spend a lot of money for that parking. You park in that lot to tailgate. Allow our tail to be gated. My kids love to sit on the open trunk bumper (don't ask me why), and I want to afford them this ridiculous but necessary pleasure. Nevertheless, I enjoy being around lit grills and semi-lit fans. My rub was in good form, but I will not buy my pork chops from Jewel again. I know this yet I did it anyway. I blame the weight loss. Still cannot beat the Johnsonvilles.

Question: Why four preseason games?
Answer: 2 soft drinks and a cotton candy...$17.50.

Lance Briggs can't drive but boy, can he play. I can just picture old Lance getting that $1,000,000 check from the Bears and running off to the expensive car dealer and pulling a Tony Montana. "How much for this one?...Is that all? Allright, Manny, bulletproof this, here, this. And get me one of those scanners. And one of those scramblers for those satellites. What, gun-turrets are extra? You're a funny guy." Lance is looking to land one of those "lady-tigers." Just don't ask Urlacher to set you up.

Gross.

2007-08-20T20:49:00.000-07:00

All right, you can't fumble snaps. You can't. Ever. Never. Ever. It's like misspelling your own name. Once September 9th rolls around, I better not see that. No snap...no contract.

Now for something completely different. Peyton Manning is so good at taking advantage of what you do well, he forces you into changing your scheme. Manning forces the Bears out of the Cover-2. The Bears played man-to-man on that drive where Harrison and Wayne seemed to get tons of cushion. You cannot roll up and bump those two; they are too good. The Bears will concede the yardage between the twenties, try to shorten the area in which those two can roam and take their chances. I want to hate Manning, but he is too goddamn good. He is so frustrating to watch when he plays your team. He makes you feel as if you have no chance.

I did not see the Bears run anything but vanilla offense with the firsts. No slot with Olsen, no real downfield attempts. It's practice, I guess. I notice that they never seem to run the slants with Rex. He might be too short for that throw. I would hate to think that was true. Griese gets that call alot. I still believe that you can't win without a QB that can put pressure on the opposing defense. You just can't have him lose games. He is testing my faith. Like a pedophile priest.

I'm Buggin' Out

2007-08-15T11:57:00.000-07:00

I am a victim of the latest outbreak of unidentified biting insects. I have 11 or 12 of these mysterious bites on my neck, arms and torso. The "experts" are attributing these bites to an unknown "itch mite." All I can tell you is that these bites itch and hurt. Quite a combo. I have been outside in the evenings with the football at a park in Hinsdale. You think those rich pricks could by a fogger or some shit. I must remember the DeepWoods Off.

All is quiet in Bourboncity. No injuries to be concerned about. Knock on wood. A long wait until Monday night versus the Colt. Watch the new Colt left tackle, rookie Tony Ugoh. He was thrust into the starting lineup when longtime vet Tarik Glenn suddenly retired. I am eager to see Mark Anderson take on the rook. Other than that, 3 series and out for the starters. And Peyton Manning's neck.

Takin' Care of Business

2007-08-12T19:11:00.000-07:00

The Bears came out of the first exhibition game with a solid B in performance and an A for "nobody gets a season-ending torn Achilles tendon." The offense got the ball moving, and Rex looked like he could see the field. Big plus: opponents will have few answers for Greg Olsen. He looks like the real deal. Defensively, aggressive play was the theme. The DB's went after that football like bobcats stuck in phone booths. Need to see some pass rush next week. All this talk about a battle for left end left me wondering who really cares about these two, Agounlye and Brown. Let's get after it!

Coach Ditka kills me. He talks so fast, he doesn't finish his words. "The Bears have a very good defen... just not a grea defen." Also, he said that the Bears are becoming America's team, replacing the Dallas Cowboys. Huh? Just because there are displaced Chicagoans around America does not make the Bears "America's Team." I doubt we are converting those Patriot fans like Christians convert Botswanians. Right, Dave? I would love to hear the Coach all season. A true Chicago treasure.

"Little" Game this Saturday.

2007-08-08T09:34:00.000-07:00

Optimism continues to run unchecked down there in Bearbonnaise. We will see the starters play about two series on Saturday night. Anything short of a dominant 14-0 lead midway through the 1st quarter will cause a disturbance in the "force." Just wait for the mood swings on Monday if Rex tosses a pick. My heart is aflutter with anticipation for the big practice game.

Today is the first practice for the mighty 11-12 year-old, St. Isaac Jogues Trojans. It is also my first practice as a head coach. It will also be my last year as a football coach for a while. Having another baby girl will enlist me into the head-dad role again.

As most of you who know me, this head coaching thing could bring a bit of the lunatic out. For instance, I have thought lately that two-a-days don't seem so unreasonable anymore. Rational thinking, however, allows me to decide that doubles are not appropriate for 5th and 6th graders. Really, the best thing I learned about coaching football is that although I played football for 14 years and have studied, thought about and watched football for 41 years, I really don't know shit about coaching football. That realization makes me a better coach every day.

Coaches are teachers. Hence, I think about teaching. Although football is the subject matter, communicating and instructing are the real skills. I don't believe you necessarily have had to play a lot of football to coach the game. Certainly, knowledge of the basics of the game is essential. But the ability to teach the game is a whole different discipline.

I have had many coaches who were, for lack of a better title, assholes. Many of them bragged on their glory days. Football playing experience helped create these monsters. However, I have played a lot of football. The three men with whom I coach have all played college football. One coach played on the 1983 University of Miami national championship team. Yet, these are all good men and excellent coaches. Why? Because they put the kids first. They truly take care of these boys. We feel responsible for giving them the best football experience of their lives.

What's the difference among ex-football player coaches? I think the longer you have played football, you will ultimately be humbled by the game. If you were a grade school standout, high school is an awakening. If you were talented enough to blow through your high school career, Division 1 college is waiting to beat you down. If college football was no challenge, please get in line for a speed trap ass-kicking over there in the NFL, rookie. Eventually, you have got to have or remember that day or play that humbled you as a football player.

As for me, I was always humbled by the game. Football was a constant challenge. I loved the competition; I loved surprising coaches with perfectly executed blocks. I appreciated the mental skills I had in order to compensate for my lack of physical ones. It allowed me to get on the field and be a part of a team, be a part of victories and be a part of something I could say that I help build.

With our collective humility, we as a staff want to help our kids fall in love with the game that we love. We don't take ourselves too seriously. We reflect on all the bad coaches we have had and don't repeat their mistakes. We take the good stuff from the good ones. Most importantly, we watch and listen to our kids. When they respect the game and enjoy the experience, we feel great. When they come back for another season, we have done our job.

The Love Machine

2007-08-01T09:51:00.000-07:00

When I played football at St. Rita Grade School, every season the parents would throw pizza parties for us. It was usually before the playoffs. During the festivities, every player was asked to stand up and give a mini-speech. Due to the shyness of most that age, a similar mantra was repeated. It went like this: "If the line blocks and the backs run...we will win." As the procession of speakers progressed, each would add another refrain. "If the kickers kick, if the fans cheer, etc." It was an 11 year-olds, "He's Got the Whole World in His Hands" thing.

If Rex Grossman were in this oratorical kick-line, he should add the line "If the Coaches coach...we will win the Super Bowl." Rex's 2006 inconsistent play is well known, beaten into our heads like multiplication tables. Yet, I wonder why, in the teeth of the interception-fumble storms, did Ron Turner continue to call the same plays that Rex was unable to execute. The job of a coach is to put your team in a position to be successful. Time after time, they would put Rex back on the field and call plays that the opposing defenses had clearly taken away.

"If the coaches coach," means that if they can't protect Rex, they should stop the deep drops. If the running game is not successful early, they need to stay patient. If Rex ain't gettin' er done, he should be yanked. Talk is cheap folks. I don't believe it until I see it in game conditions. So, tone down affection for the Underwear Bowl over there in Boubon-city. Rex got his year of Lovie love. Today, it's all about wins. If he has to go...so be it. Nothing should stand in our way, not even the possible fragile psyche of one player.

We Have a Great Touch Football Team.

2007-07-29T05:47:00.000-07:00

Let's calm down. Nothing can really be determined by shirts-shorts practices. Love Muffin is enthused, and he should be. It is easy to be overly excited at the start of camp. Let's see how he feels when a Matt Leinart-type shreds the 1st D like last year's week 3 exhibition.
Everyone looks fast at the beginning of camp. That's because the players have only seen their kids running around at the waterpark. Or, they themselves have been running alone from the media after leaving court. They should have sent Devin Hester out first, as a decoy.

It's Here!

2007-07-26T09:42:00.000-07:00

When the clock strikes midnight, the Bears will all be in camp. The season will have officially begun. I am ready. I am very optimistic about this season. That is not always the case. However, Jerry Angelo did a great job this off-season with the business of Bears football. This season, the Love Muffin will do his job. The defense is back, intact. Folks, don't sweat the yardage. It's all about turnovers and points allowed. Our D is great in both of those categories.

As for the O, well, never underestimate the power of the contract year. Rex, we will know if you will stay or go. It is time for the Benson test. Let's see a healthy Mark Bradley for 16 games. I can tell you that I see good things coming from the offensive side of the ball.

The Bears are a playoff team. Especially in the NFC North. I have been a sceptic in the past. Not this year. A good, tough schedule will test and season our Bears. By playoff time, they will be a better football team than last year. Better and more consistent. Plus, we have Robbie Gould!!!

I cannot wait to kick it off. First pre-season game, Saturday August 25 v. SanFrancisco. Come on out to the parking lot. We are grilling it up for the new season.

R.I.F.

2007-07-23T14:42:00.000-07:00

I don't get to read like I used to. Back in the day, B.F. (before kids), I could read a book for hours straight. It was my favorite pastime. Now I grab a few pages here and there, before falling asleep at night, in the bathroom, whenever I get a free half an hour. It is not the same.

I would visualize the story and the characters in my head. I would choose the actors that would play the characters in the movie. Alec Baldwin is not Dave Robichaeux (James Lee Burke's great ex-cop character). Robert Urich as Spencer, O.K. I guess. Robert Shaw as Quint from Jaws by Peter Benchley...Masterstroke.

I would lose myself in a book. It relaxed me and took me away from reality. Reality can be exhausting, don't you think? I remember reading a whole book on my honeymoon in Jamaica. It was "And the Band Played On." A chilling look at the origin and evolution of HIV and AIDS. I have powdered off a couple on the few long plane trips we have taken. That's about it.

My only real everyday relaxation place is our neighborhood pool. In fact, I read "Unitas" by Tom Callahan at the pool. Great book, great location. I try to get there as much as I can. Now all I need is a long plane ride to a beach in Mexico with no kids. I could read like a wild man.

I have a better chance of winning the lottery twice in one week.

Just Fly Me in for Games

2007-07-17T10:16:00.000-07:00

I will not be attending Bears summer camp practice in Bourbonnais, Illinois. I am not against the idea of watching a football practice. In fact, I do it all the time. I will not be a party to a circus, however. Remember the scene in Rocky 3 when Sly trains for his first fight with Clubber Lang (Mr. T) in the ballroom of a swanky hotel? Well, that's the Bears camp in Bourbonnais. I have seen the photos, too many people and too many distractions. I will quote Mickey to Lovie and Bears management. "Let's get outta here and go back to the old gym, and really work."

The "old gym" was Platteville, Wisconsin. Far away and not very fan friendly. A great place to get some work done. That is the purpose of a camp. Build some camaraderie, bust some asses and sort out the players from the arena-leaguers. I have been to Platteville, and it was all football. The move back toward Chicago was for money. That's all it could be for. In Platteville, you watched practice in the early a.m. Then, you left campus for lunch in town, which was neat. They had a great little main street, and the locals loved having you there. After lunch, you went back for another practice. If you stayed over night, you could probably catch a beer with a player at one of the local bars. Good Times.

Now they have a Fan Experience area and all kinds of nonsense. You can't bring a grill or a cooler. You have to spend your dough inside the gates. Bad Times. They should go back to Wisconsin and get serious about football. Screw the fans. If you love the Bears, you would take a drive up there.

Besides, you saw what Rocky did to Clubber after he went slummin' at Apollo Creed's gym. That is what the Bears should be doing. After all, movies imitate real life, right?

Neil Young is SO RIGHT.

2007-07-10T19:12:00.000-07:00

In 1982, I saw Ozzy Osbourne perform live at the Rosemont Horizon. I loved Ozzy. He rocked. He was charasmatic. He was bigger than life. He rocked. It was a great show. If he had a concert in my backyard today, I would hide in my basement with the doors locked.

I want to remember being a young person. In order to do that, I don't want to be around OLD people doing things that YOUNG people do. I leave the live "rock n' roll" for those who should be there, young people. There are few things worse than these reunion concerts for long gone rock bands. I am trying to think of something worse...Got one: Cancer. Can't think of another on short notice.

I don't want to be reminded that I don't rock. I don't watch "Old-Timer's" games. Shame on these bands, Def Leppard, the Police, the ROLLING STONES, for the grand larceny that they are pulling on their "fans." Stop it. Better to have pulled a John Bonham, lose a member to choking on vomit, and burn out. Instead, these bastards think that we still need them. So, they pull all these baby boomer losers into a crappy outdoor venue and regurgitate their 20 year-old hits. Worse, they play "new" music. Ugh, stay gone. Hey, middle aged man, better to rip "Zenyatta Mondatta" into the I-pod and keep it to yourself.

I don't apply this theory to all music or all bands. Obviously, Tom Petty, Neil Young, U2 and other bands have been relevant and continue to bring new and interesting music to the world. They are not the problem. As for the real culprits, well, we all know who they are. I only wish Axl did.

The Mouths That Whimper

2007-07-02T08:36:00.000-07:00

Chicago sports used to have great announcers. Great voices and great personalities were the norm. Now, blah, blah, blahs. The Bears had Wayne Larrivee, the hardest working voice in sports. He left for Green Bay, his dream job. OK, I understand that. For his replacement, we get Jeff Joniak, who is terrible. He has an uninspiring tone, and no credibility. Grade: A to D.

The Cubs had Harry Caray, Steve Stone, Jack Brickhouse, and Milo Hamilton. All very good or great. I hate the Cubs and do not listen to their TV or radio announcers regularly. I think Pat Hughes is good, and I like Santo. Maybe you Cub fans can let me know. I would say A to a C.

The White Sox had Harry and Piersall. The kings. Now they have Hawk and DJ on TV. They are OK. A to a B-. Radio is where I get pissed. We go from John Rooney, one of the great voices in all sports, doing play by play, to Ed Farmer taking over the role. Rooney and Farmer, as color, was a kick-ass lineup. I could listen to Rooney reading a traffic report. Farmer sucks as a play by play man. He is humorless and dull. The Sox could have kept Rooney but they went on the cheap. Now, when I am in Western or Southern Illinois, I can hear him with Mike Shannon, doing the Cardinal broadcast. It is great. Grade A to F. The Cardinals went from Jack Buck, Hall of Famer, to Rooney. Great replacement; the Redbirds are a high-class operation.

The Bulls had Jim Durham and Neil Funk, both top of line. Nobody watches the NBA on TV let alone listens to it on the radio. Grade A to ? Tom Doerr and Red Kerr blow. Grade: Blow.

Last but not least, the Chicago Blackhawks. This is the worst. Legendary announcer Llyod Petitt then, Pat Foley manned the mike for my whole life. Then, for no good reason, other than they are the cheapest, lowest, dirtiest, lowdown, ratbastard fucks that ever owned a sports franchise, the Hawks dropped Foley. This should be a felony; get Blago on this. Foley was the best; great voice and opinionated. He called a dog a dog, or in this case a Hawk a dog. I never missed a game. I had to listen; the Hawks were not on TV (Ugghh.) Foley could paint the picture and raise your pulse. When the road games were on TV, it was a bonus, his voice with pictures. Grade A+ to "Death by Lethal Injection."

I am a cranky old fan, but I am right on this. So uninspired, these franchises. If the Sox don't sign Buerhle, just wait. I'll be off them for life.

Somewhere Over the South Side

2007-07-02T07:40:00.001-07:00

I grew up on the Southwest side of Chicago. I lived there for 18 straight years. I was liberated in August of 1984. You may wonder how Galesburg, Illinois was an improvement, but let me tell you, it was as if the world had opened up to me. I had to get out; I got out; I never went back. I have done quick recon missions and worked in Markham for 5 years, but I never blended back into the clan. I thought about it several times, then, came to my senses. Or, my wife reminded me of why I left in the first place.

There is only one thing left in that area that "pulls me back in." The original Rainbow Cone. The ice cream joint of my youth. 92nd and Western, the original building still stands. There is a large, replica Rainbow cone on the roof that still lights up. The prize is a large cone, flat scooped with five flavors, into a wave of sweet delight. Chocolate, strawberry, pistachio, Palmer House, and topped with orange sherbet. Palmer House is an original, yellow vanilla with chunks of cherries. Alone, each of these flavors would not rank as favorites. I am a butter pecan man. But together, I loved this cone. It was always a stop with my grandmother, Busha, as well as a frequent destination for my mother. My dad would take us but order nothing. He was not a dessert guy.

Kathleen and I took the kids Saturday evening. It is a drive; there is no easy way to my old home. The rainbow cone was worth it. It tasted like I remembered. The memories were bittersweet. My youth is fading from memory, dying. It is hanging by a thread. My whole focus is on the future, my family, the kids, my own. I hold on to St. Rita high school and an ice cream cone. It will not go gently.

Eenee, Meenee, Minee...Socks?

2007-06-27T12:41:00.000-07:00

I love being a criminal defense lawyer. I loved being a prosecutor. Criminal law is the only branch of the law that I will ever practice. As if the rest of the legal community would have me. That would be fine, because I cannot stand 90% of lawyers. The lawyers I have associated myself with over the past 15 + years are in the criminal field. As a whole, they are good and honorable people. The best trial lawyers are criminal lawyers. That is my biased opinion. If you ever consider watching a trial, just ask me and I will find the best lawyer match-up for you. When it is done right, a criminal trial is great viewing.

The problem is that you you needed one, you won't know where to look for the best criminal lawyers. It is a crapshoot for the layman. Hopefully, someone close to you will have a referral to a good lawyer. A lawyer who will give you his best, and his best is actually worth the fee. I hope your blood curdles when you see a lawyer advertise on cable, billboard or, worst of all, in a mass mailing to your home when you have been pinched for DUI or stealing a pack of gum from the Walgreen's. Put your life into that person's hands and good luck on the outcome of your case. McJustice, churn em' and burn em'. It is a disgrace to our profession. Those lawyers are about the money and nothing else. I value my reputation over that kind of a practice. I know that I will not get rich doing this job my way. It doesn't matter. I hope to have the respect and reputation of a good and professional lawyer. Besides, I ain't crying poor.

You can always read the paper and hire a lawyer based on how good he says he is. Like the lawyer for one of the "Family Secrets" mobsters. He had a field day talking to John Kass about his pink and red socks and other wardrobe selections. He even mentioned his fashion sense in his opening statement to the jury. How is that helping the guy charged with 12 murders sitting next to him? He also is writing about the trial on a blog. He calls himself "the Shark," and has titled his column, "Shark Attacks." I will now stick a fork in my eye.

I will not retract my opening statement just because most lawyers are balloonheads. I don't despise my profession because most lawyers are money grubbing whores. This is the business that I have chosen. I do it my way, the right way, and have to answer only to myself. My clients know what I am all about, and they know me. That is all that I can control. It doesn't mean that sometimes I want to light myself on fire.

Tank You Very Much

2007-06-27T10:02:00.000-07:00

In the words of Dr. Smith, "Ohhhh, the pain." Our team is left depth-crippled by another buffoon. One good season and it all turns to shit. I have no problem with the decision. The Bears did the right thing. Cut ties, rid yourself of the cancer. It just sucks is all. "He is gone, and there is nothing that can be done about it."

Nothing good happens after midnight. My dad told me that a few times, and he was right. I never had that good of a time after midnight. Usually, I became quite tired. Even back in my teens and twenties, I was a party pooped pooper after 12 bells. I would usually be home or in bed by 1:00 a.m. at the latest. A square, if you must label me. Of course, I avoided being pulled over at 3:30 a.m. Obviously, I can't play a one-gap DT for the Bears.

Despite all this post-Super Bowl nonsense, I am looking forward to the arrival of my season tickets. Any day now. They come in two big perforated sheets. I get to carefully fold them over and tear them apart. Then I sort them out and hold them in a fan, like a deck of cards. I look at them and feel them. I get excited about the season. Did I just say this out loud?

To further ruin anyone's remaining high opinion of me, I find myself listening to the NFL channel on Sirius RADIO. I refuse to listen to local sports talk radio and anything with Jim Rome. Asshole talking to assholes. But I can't get enough of these NFL guys, Pat Kirwin, Adam Shine, Solomon Wilcots, etc. When it's not Howard Stern, it's this channel. I find myself chiming in with my opinions on the topic of discussion. Outloud and alone in my car. Is this bad? I think I need more rest.

One more season of "The Wire" before our HBO "sleeps with the fishes."

Sipping on Juice...With My Mind on My Money

2007-06-26T15:34:00.000-07:00

I am sitting here at the computer with Mary Cate, who will be two years old tomorrow. Mary wants to write about juice and the two dollar bill that she is holding. I am feeling good about the contract extension for CB Nathan Vasher. Five years, $24 million with $14 million of that up-front and guaranteed. The next move is Peanut Tillman's extension. Locking up two excellent man-to-man cover corners is a Jerry Angelo move, "Reward production." The Bears sign their core guys to extensions before the player's free agent season. Read Vasher's comments to the press. Here is a guy who was realistic in his wants and was thrilled with the financial security provided in this deal. He wants to be a Bear and is paid like the Pro-Bowler that he is. Everybody Wins. Now after Tillman is extended, there will be no money to EVER pay Lance Briggs. Boo Hoo.

Now for the juice. The murder-suicide of professional wrestler Chris Benoit is a disgusting story. When I here people say that Benoit was an all together good and down-to-earth guy, I blame steroids. That "sport" is rampant with unchecked drug use. Look at the list of wrestlers who have died before the age of 45 over the past decade. It is horrible. This is the result of indiscriminate steroid use. Prove me wrong.

Money and juice.

Back From B-BQ Land

2007-06-21T22:04:00.000-07:00

Back from a family trip. Springfield, IL. to Memphis, Tn. No football in the state capital. Memphis has the Liberty Bowl but no NFL team to speak of. That is all the football news I have. I love the South; Great town, great food and Beale Street (Great music). I would love to go back with my wife and no kids. That would be called a "vacation."

I also found out that my last child will be a feminine child. Some people (see: Males) have expressed some sympathy for me. Also, they have mentioned my love of football in this context. Please, don't waste your sympathy on me. I couldn't be happier. As far as I can tell or have been told, the baby is doing great. My wife is doing fine. That is all I need. Football is a hobby. The family is my life. I can share my life and life lessons with my girls. That is a unisex type of job.

As for my hobby, I really need it to begin. It is a great diversion for my mind. This new eating and exercising lifestyle is doing wonders for my physical health. My mental health is kind of shot. I feel stressed out, man. Football is my great escape. One day, I hope one of my kids goes to an SEC school, Vanderbilt maybe. That would be some Dad's weekend trip. B-BQ, beer and ball. A guy can dream.

Father's Day XI

2007-06-13T20:12:00.000-07:00

I miss my father every day. It is not because we spent a lot of time together or talked constantly. It's just that when my dad died, I felt cast adrift in the world. It's because I always knew that my dad was steering the ship. Since childhood, I always believed that I was safe because my dad was at the helm. When he left, I was 39 years old, but I knew then and still know now that this feeling will never pass. That is just the way it is with your father. I feel lucky to have had such a steady hand on the steering wheel.

One of the most important things I have ever done was to eulogize my dad. It was a special opportunity to share my feelings about him with others. He deserved it. I did have practice, however. I told my dad what he meant to me while he was alive, on a Father's Day. My dad was an acquired taste, and it took some time for me to figure him out. When I did, I had to tell him. I wanted him to know; I wanted no regrets. It felt good to say how much I admired him and how much he influenced my accomplishments. I know he was proud of the man that I had become. The guy that blogs before you owes his dad so much. He taught me how to sail.

I steer the ship now. I was ready when it came my turn at the wheel. The kids don't see the unsteady hand; they just see the man standing tall, facing down the squall. They don't need to feel the burden of navigating through the icebergs; they need only to feel the joy of finding new and fun lands. I try to get them to keep an orderly deck. I keep trying. I love being a father. They would get the lifeboats, and I would go down with the ship. I love them so much.

I have been blessed with great mentors and role models in my life. My college football coach Randy, my father-in-law Pat, my friends Tom and Will are all people who I look up to and admire for the kind of men that they are. I love, respect and honor them on this Father's Day. They are great fathers and great men. I have told them that. No regrets.

This Sunday, find your dad and honor him in your own way. But let him know that he is doing a great job. He deserves to hear it. He wants to know that his hard work, love and care has meant something. Trust me, it will mean the world to him.

Will I Name my Child Brian or Brianna?

2007-06-10T04:18:00.000-07:00

Recently, ESPN.com has been running a series on the "Best of" NFL players and teams. Best QB, first player chosen to build a franchise, most valuable running back have been some of the topics. Four "experts" make the choices. When it came down to most valuable defensive player, Brian Urlacher received two of the four votes. Champ Bailey, Bronco cornerback, got the other two. Urlacher deserves the accolade. In my opinion, he is and will remain the greatest middle linebacker to ever play in the Cover-2 defense.

In the past, the Cover-2 showcased the weak outside linebacker or "Will" backer. Our local, successful example is the dead Lance Briggs. Cover-2 is a two-deep, zone pass defense. Think of two safeties splitting up the deep halves of the field. It is not a blitzing D; you rely on your front four down lineman to get pressure and disrupt the run game. They should be fast and physical. The linebackers are responsible to make the tackles. They also have pass responsibilities and have to be very skilled. The scheme was set up for an athletic and speedy Will to run free, make a bushel full of tackles and make big plays.

The greatest Will backer in Cover-2 history is Tampa Bay's Derrick Brooks. Canton is waiting for this guy. Tons of tackles and, listen up Briggsy, tons of interceptions. The middle linebacker position in a Cover-2 scheme was never acknowledged. Not until Urlacher came along. He can do it all. No player gets to the ball faster than him. He covers sideline to sideline. When he gets there, he is a violent tackler and is an expert at creating a turnover. I hear people say "Urlacher cannot stuff the run" or "he can't get off a blocker." These are misguided criticisms. First of all, the days of the "run-stuffing LB" are over. Those guys would have to come off the field on 3rd down and were a liability in pass coverage. Secondly, name me one linebacker that can get off a 325 pound lineman. This is not 1979. The idea is to keep the O-line off the linebackers. I hate people who don't understand the modern game. Get over it.

The real "freak" quality of Urlacher is his pass defense. He drops so deep in the secondary because of his speed, he can eliminate a threat in the middle of the field. He can neutralize a fast and skilled tight end. He can also shut down a slot receiver. That enables the two safeties a cushion to cover less area. When he blitzes, which is not often, he will get sacks. Name me another MLB who can do all of that. Ever. Don't say Butkus. The Bears sucked when he played. I love that rationalization, "you beat the Bears, but they punished you." Big fuckin' deal. How about winning a game on defense? How many of those have we seen since 54 got here.

If anyone had doubts about the greatness of Urlacher as a MLB, last year's Arizona Cardinal, Monday night football game should have dispelled them. If it did not, well then, you should not be allowed to watch the NFL. Down by three touchdowns, Urlacher single-handedly took that game away from Arizona. He made all the tackles. All of them. Arizona refused to throw so Urlacher said "I'll clean up." Rex gave the ball away; Urlacher took it back. He pulled it out of their arms. So, not only did he stop them, he started us. He skilled and willed the Bears to an unbelievable victory.

That is what is great about Urlacher and great football players. Denny Green was right; the Bears "are what we thought they were." He had game-planned perfectly, knew the Bears weaknesses and exploited the matchups. But you can't beat a great player on paper. You have to do it in the game. The Cardinals knew what Urlacher could do, but they couldn't stop him. It was a virtuoso performance. Skill and desire, an unbeatable combination.

So, stop with the critiques. This season, everyone sit back and watch a one-of-a-kind football player. You won't be dissappointed. Sometimes, Urlacher does not have gaudy stats. But if the Bears are dominating on defense, it is DIRECTLY because of what he is doing. If we are getting schooled, they have an answer for him in that game. He ain't gonna be around forever, enjoy it.

I have never owned a Bears jersey, never wore one. If I thought about it, I would only wear a Payton 34. This off-season, a friend gave me an Urlacher 54. I think I may wear it to a game. He is the best defensive player in the league. Despite this post, I do not have a man-crush on Urlacher. Not that I am above such feelings, but he is not my type. Too many babies-mamas, bad decisions in clubs or Trader Joe's or wherever this dumb ass meets chicks. And he is dumb, as a post. But give me 11 solos, 6 assists, 1 interception, 1.5 sacks and a forced fumble on a Sunday, and, hell, I'll cook you dinner.

Return to Campus

2007-06-09T07:45:00.000-07:00

On Friday, I will return to Knox College for a reunion of Alumni football players. I am very proud of my college football career. Knox is a small school (900-1100 enrollment), and football holds no special status there. However, my last season of football stands as one of the greatest accomplishments of my life. It was achieved with a special group of classmates and a coach who remains a mentor and role model.

I went to Knox for school, not to play football. I had a miserable high school experience, and I hated the game. I was going away to college, leaving my neighborhood and football behind. I was talked into playing by the coach, Joe Campanelli. That first college season was for me. I just enjoyed playing the game again. The team was awful. The upperclassmen accepted losing and did not invest any effort into the program. I hated to lose and hated them. There was one saving grace. Every freshman felt the same way that I did. That spring Joe Campanelli quit. The college hired Randy Oberembt as new head football coach.

The change was immediate. Coach O was an intense guy. He looked you directly in the eye and demanded your best. I gave my heart and soul to Knox football. For the next two seasons, we struggled to turn the corner. Despite a 180 degree change in effort, three losing seasons marked my Knox career. It came down to the last season, 1987, our senior year. Knox last winning season had been in 1976. The pressure was palpable. If we didn't get it done, all the hard work and commitment would be for naught.

Additionally, our last game of 1986 weighed heavily upon me. We were destroyed by our arch rival, Monmouth College, by a score of 46-0. We quit as a team in that game. I quit in that game. We were physically manhandled, and emotionally crushed. It was an embarrassing and shameful performance. It haunted me then and is still hard to talk about. But it motivated me. We would not let it end that way.

That last year, we achieved the winning season by the sixth game. When we faced Monmouth at home in the Knox Bowl for our final game, we were 6-2 and had a chance at the conference championship. We played a great game. We lost in the last 2:00 minutes. I took it hard. It was my last football game. Looking back, I have no regrets. We accomplished our goals and played our hearts out until the end. I still see four of my teammates every year. I look forward to seeing some of my other fellow 1987 football teammates. It was a special year.

After that season, I was in Coach's office talking about life, the future, and football. I looked around the room and saw the pictures on the wall. On display were photos of the five Little All-American players from the past three years. There was one other photo on the wall. It was mine. I was surprised; I had been a three-year starter but was never All-Conference or anything. I asked Coach what was up. He told me, "You are Knox Football. You are the example of what I believe a great program is all about. Your leadership and commitment are what made this team special." It was the greatest compliment I ever received in sports. Although Knox is still a little program, I am proud of being a Siwash. (Don't ask.)

December 20, 1998-The Greatest Game Ever Played

2007-06-05T11:13:00.000-07:00

At the age of 32, my greatest dream as a football fan was to see an NFL game from the sideline. On December 20, 1998, that dream came true. My job as an assistant state's attorney brought me into contact with a deputy Cook County sheriff who was a security supervisor at Soldier Field. His son was a victim of a felony battery, and I prosecuted the case. He heard that I dreamed of watching an NFL game up close and personal. He made it happen. I was given a magic pass and one for a friend. The pass said "McCormick Place Maintenance." I asked my Dad to come with me. I was officially "Hooked Up."

When we arrived at our special mini-gate, the door opened and we were escorted through. At the field, a guard allowed us onto the gridiron with a flourish. Amazing what a laminated placard hanging from your neck can accomplish.

We found a spot on the sideline and looked around. I couldn't believe my eyes. There were a hundred civilians all over the place. I was crushed. This was supposed to be an impossible feat. The sideline was top security only. Who were these jokers? All pre-game, women and children are walking up and down the sideline. These people with no reverence for what was to take place on this field in a few minutes. Get them out of here. They were killing my buzz.

My disappointment was short-lived. After the National Anthem, the ghost of Ditka appeared and removed all the infidels. All that remained were the Bears, the coaches, NFL Films, John McQuaid and son. We had the joint to ourselves. The Bears with a 3-10 record vs. the Baltimore Ravens with a 2-11 record, a hugely anticipated affair. The Bears trotted out for the kickoff. Jim Schwantz, the Bears special teams stud, took a knee and prayed.

Once the ball was kicked off, I knew what he prayed for. HIS LIFE. Schwantz ran after the ball, found the biggest player on the Ravens return team and ran into him as hard as he could. It sounded like an M-80 explosion. I was ecstatic. It didn't matter that both teams blew chunks; this was football at its highest level. The players were huge and fast. It was like watching car crash after car crash. I was in awe of the quarterback's ability to do anything with the ball. It was like standing in the middle of the freeway and trying to get the license numbers of the cars whizzing past. Impossible.

I don't think my dad was quite as thrilled. For starters, he had no where to sneak off for a smoke. You also couldn't drink beer on the sideline. Sorry, Dad. I, however, fell in love with the NFL for life. The Bears played well that day and won 24-3. It didn't matter. The thrill existed in each play. Every collision was memorable. I gained great respect for the players. They take years off of their lives playing pro football. They destroy their bodies, all for my enjoyment. I know that sounds sick, but hell, I'm sick.

I would love to go back down there. The experience was sports-life changing. College football is for pansies. The true gladiators still exist. They perform every Sunday in the fall at a stadium near you.

All We Are Saying...Is Give Rex a Chance

2007-06-03T06:03:00.000-07:00

In 1974, the Pittsburgh Steelers opened the season with a new quarterback, Joe Gilliam. The coaching staff had decided to bench their young 3-year veteran and former starter, Terry Bradshaw. The fans were merciless on Terry. Despite team success, he made a many mistakes and bad decisions with the ball. The Steelers succumbed to the pressure and sent Bradshaw to the pine.

The change lasted for 5 games. The Steelers stunk. In comes Bradshaw, and Pittsburgh goes on to win the Super Bowl. Bradshaw subsequently makes the all-decade team, wins three more Super Bowls and is elected to the Hall of Fame. Often, a little patience brings great reward.

Bradshaw is a legend; Rex is not. However, there are similarities. Both have big arms. Bradshaw was known for throwing interceptions; many interceptions. Both lack a conscience. They continue to fire despite continual failure. They are fearless. Both received unrelenting criticism, yet continued to have success. Most important, they had good teams around them.

Bradshaw had great teams. Hall of Famers on offense-RB Franco Harris, WR Lynn Swann, WR John Stallworth. Don't forget they put one of the greatest defenses on the field, the Steel Curtain. The Bears have very little talent on offense. The Bears have a good defense and good special teams. 70's Steelers crush the 2000's Bears.

Be patient. After one full season as QB1, the Grossman-led Bears won the NFC. He will only get better. A great QB is a luxury. Only a few are found in a decade. Grossman is never going to be great, but he can lead this team. He is doing that right now. The players in the huddle want to win for him. They believe in him. That's what counts. He is a leader, just like Bradshaw.

Grossman needs help. Elway, Favre, Marino and Aikman needed help. Super Bowls are won by great teams who play great. We need more weapons on offense. Rex can't catch his own passes. They need the running game. All championship offenses have one. Greg Olsen needs to be the player worthy of first round consideration. A fast tight end who presents nightmarish matchups in pass coverage. A weapon. A younger and better offensive line. I look at this offense and get depressed. And it ain't because of Grossman. Believe that.

"Dad, I can't believe you wore THAT outside the house!"

2007-05-29T12:08:00.000-07:00

The ZUBAZ are dead. Long live the Zubaz. I have officially thrown away my Bears-themed Zubaz pants. You know the pants. Baggy, pajama material covered in blue and orange tiger stripes. Hideous, granted, yet essential to any football fanatics wardrobe, circa 1987.

Truthfully, this expunged pair was my second. My first pair were bought in the 1980's. I believe they were featured on an episode of VH1's "I Love the 80's." I wore them quite often. I did not throw out that pair; they just evaporated like most men's underwear. I enjoyed those Zubaz. They off- set my friend's Packer Zubaz, the green and yellow tiger stripes. Of course, I had no girlfriend or any dates with girls.

The second pair was purchased recently. New with tags on E-bay. When I reintroduced the style to Kathleen, she rolled her eyes. Not much of a reaction I'll admit, but she has known me for 16+ years. Appropriately, I was admonished not to be seen in those pants by anyone that she knew. The kids freaked out. They were not yet worn to the nub by my fashions. Now they understand the potential of true embarrassment. I only share the valuable lessons.

Nobody forced me to purge the pants. The Bears lost both games that I wore those goofy things. (At home, in front of the TV) I did not test the luck of the pants at a live game. I value sleeping under my own roof. The pants had to go because they were "losing" pants. If the outcome of those games had been different, they would have made it to Soldier Field. You would have seen other mentally ill men similarly attired. I would have fit right in.

My Off-Season

2007-05-25T11:47:00.000-07:00

I probably made a mistake by starting an all-Bears blog in May. The post-draft/pre-camp months are very uneventful. This might be bad for blogging, but it is good for recharging the gridiron battery. I need the break. A full season of football wears me out.

In younger days, sports dominated my life. "All sports, every season" was my motto. I would watch anything, rodeo, lacrosse, whatever, as long as they kept score. Now it is just football and college basketball. I gave up on baseball; pro basketball is pure crap. You already saw my hockey post. I really don't like professional athletes. Most of all, I despise golf. It is a huge waste of time. I think that the powers-that-be should rename the game of golf. They should call it "AMF" (Avoiding My Family).

I refuse to watch Arena football. It makes no sense to me. The reality is that it is not football. It's indoor soccer with pads. The NFL Europe is just minor league football, slower and less skilled professionals. I won't watch that either. Why blow my diet with a McDonald's cheeseburger? If I'm going down, it is with a Morton's burger. If they offered real football (NFL, high school, whatever) in the spring and summer, I would be doomed.

It is a 6 month season. Some will say, and you know who you are, a 6 month obsession. What can I say? I love it. It makes me feel like a kid. But now when the season is over, I need a break from football and caring about sports. After all, I am not a kid anymore. Those damn bills that keep coming in the mail remind me of that.

If a Mediocre Defensive End Falls In the Woods...

2007-05-21T09:25:00.000-07:00

Alex Brown, a serviceable defensive end, has asked the Bears to trade him. This scintillating bit of news has caused no phones to ring at Halas Hall. No suprise there; he just isn't that good. He is O.K. but is about to lose his starting position to second-year player Mark Anderson. Why? Because Anderson is better. There now, that was simple.

However, I don't get it. Alex Brown has three years left on a contract that pays a very good wage, overpaid some might say. He is not going to sit on the bench; the Bears rotate their defensive lineman in every series. Moreover, no NFL team will pay him more than the Bears. I don't think any will pay him close to what the Bears pay him. What does he want? Who is advising him? In Lombardi-speak, "What the HELL is going on out there?" I guess we'll find out sometime.

The question I have is why does an average football player want to leave a winning team with Super Bowl potential unless he is going to dupe some stupid team to overpay him (see: Washington Redskins)? Because he isn't a "starter?" C'mon, this is not high school. NFL teams play a lot of players in today's game. If it means that much to you Alex, beat the guy out for the job. Compete, you boob. I guess he wants to be traded to a team with lousy defensive ends so he doesn't have to work that hard. Then he will be happy because he "starts" for 7-9 non-playoff team. Amazing.

If you get to watch one episode of "America's Game" on NFL Network, you will understand my amazement. The look on the face of player when he displays his Super Bowl ring is priceless. You see a man who truly realizes why he played the game. The ONLY reason to play professional football is to be called a champion. I know that these players have a short shelf life and don't have a lot to fall back on. Money becomes a priority. But if championships aren't your goal, why would any team want you or pay you? I would want players who care about winning first and try to get as many of those guys on my roster as possible.

Alex Brown does not inspire me. He is an average player who wants to leave a winner for no good reason. Obviously, winning is not a priority for him. The Bears have invested money in a loser. He is now an obstacle in reaching another Super Bowl. To bad he has a family, otherwise, he would not be missed.

R.I.P. Chicago Blackhawks. Nobody Cares.

2007-05-16T18:47:00.000-07:00

Allow me a non-Bears post today. I read an article about the Blackhawk's owner Bill Wirtz threatening to sell the team. Some threat. Please Bill, make it a promise. That guy has ruined an Original 6 franchise. The Hawks have been one of if not THE WORST organization in professional sports. The reason for this lowly status is the owner. Plain and Simple.

The NHL as a whole has done nothing to elevate hockey from it's current "niche-sport" platform. I think the X-Games and bull riding have better TV contracts. The NHL is on Versus (formerly OLN). I can find a darts match easier than a hockey game. They lost a year to a lockout. Take that ineptitude, quadruple it and you have the Chicago Blackhawks. The Hawks are a dead subject in this town. It is a damn shame, because I used to love going to a Hawks game more than attending any other sport. Yes, that includes football.

My dad had season tickets when I was young. He shared them with some other guys. He had two seats for around 10 games. He took me to Chicago Stadium for the first time when I was around 8 years old. It was a magical place. First balcony on the blue line. Few players wore helmets, and the building rocked. My dad would fill me in on the history; he had been going to Hawks games since he was a teenager. Duke loved hockey and the Hawks. I loved it, too. I loved sharing that team with my father. When I was around 13, our house was burglarized; the tickets were pilfered. My dad never went back. The game was changing, and he just kind of lost interest. To this day, it was the only team for which my dad and I shared an equal passion.

Despite my dad's withdrawal, I was hooked. I listened to every game on the radio. My friends and I would get standing-room only tickets for the big games, Islanders, Oilers and Northstars. The Stadium was made for hockey. This was pre-Jordan. The Hawks would fill the joint. I went to every St. Rita hockey game for four years. We were really good. I played street hockey every day. I was a superfanatic. The game was fast, violent and thrilling to watch. The release of emotion when a goal was scored was euphoric. I challenge anyone to find a more exciting live sport than hockey. It does not exist.

In college, I got all my buddies watching the NHL playoffs. These were small town Illinois dudes. They loved it. The Hawks were good, making the playoffs every year. I remember going to bars with Kathleen when we were dating, to watch the playoffs. Then, all of a sudden, it was over. They cut salary and stopped making the playoffs. For Good. It made no sense.

The owner refused to strengthen the organization. He now says that he lost $50 million over the past two years. That is a complete lie. If a businessman as shrewd as Bill Wirtz was losing that kind of money, he would make a positive change. He would market his product. He would put home games on T.V. (I cannot believe I am writing that in 2007) He would pay a good general manager to fix this program. They sell no tickets and haven't really tried. He hasn't done it because he doesn't have to, and he doesn't care. He owns half of the United Center and the concessions. Money is being made.

As for me, I have moved on. It is the Bears and that's the list. However, I have to admit to feeling very nostalgic about our long forgotten NHL team. I miss the thrills, chills and cheers in a great old building. I miss watching a very good team in a clean, new building with a few bucks in my pocket. Mostly I miss driving down Western Avenue in a brown 1967 Chevy Impala with a great hockey fan. I miss tagging along with him between periods so he could have a smoke in the stairwell while I sipped a Coke. I miss being taught that there are plenty of opportunities to get out of my seat while the action is stopped. I remember the extra buck for easy-out parking. Mostly, I miss the time when I really fell in love with sports, inside the Stadium watching the Chicago Blackhawks with my dad.

Healthy Diet+Tailgate=No Fun.

2007-05-12T14:24:00.000-07:00

I am sure that the few of you who may happen to read this blog know that I have changed the way I eat. To my future football guests, do not flail your arms and lament. I will still perform on Sundays to your high-fat and cholesterol delight. I too will join you in the bacchanal. Save up those cheat calories for gameday.

I am going to tweak the menu this year. I see large BBQ shrimp in my future. Also, maybe some small steak sandwiches with crumbled blue cheese. These are not my ideas. I am stealing from some good stops this past season. Original ideas to follow. Folks, I do requests. Don't be afraid to let me know. Also, just some advice, don't be shy when you are eating my food. If you can eat the whole right side of the Cheesecake Factory menu (i.e. Bill Stanton), tailgate is not the time to be polite. I know you are a good person, just eat, goddammit.

I want to hit at least one pre-season game. The great weather and empty parking lot makes for some relaxed grilling. Plus, there is nothing on the line football-wise. Except for a season-ending injury to a starter, god forbid.

Bears Visit Tank. Not Conjugal, Hopefully.

2007-05-10T17:37:00.000-07:00

Front page of the Trib sports page-"Bears visit Tank in the County Jail." They got the jail visitor logs for Tank Johnson. Tell me the Bears are not the biggest thing in this town. Another compelling headline.

The list of visitors was impressive. Even Mike McCaskey came to see the Tank. 147 visits in 60 days and a hefty 19 visits on one Sunday. Grossman, Urlacher, Lovie, Jerry Angelo all paid their respects. The Trib did highlight a conspicuous absentee, Lance Briggs. I think a jail visit is alot to expect from a dead guy. Besides Briggs' estate and Drew Rosenhaus were too busy trying to find a shoulder to weep on. That unfair 7.2 million dollar offer for one year sticks in their craw.

I like this group of Bear players. Visiting the Cook County Jail is no picnic. Take it from me. I find any reason I can not to go in there. Hmm, let's see, I need to see two clients but, hey, I'm late for an appointment to get my leg broken. That takes priority. Yet, Tank's teammates and the organization came out en masse to see him. That is very cool. I have always believed that this team gets along, and their locker room is strong. This article only confirms that belief. That is why this team can weather adversity. That is how a team can survive the growing pains of a young QB. That is Super Bowl caliber stuff.

Tank Johnson may be suspended by the league for 8 games or more. He may never be a player. It is not about Tank. It is about his teammates. If Tank ever makes a Pro Bowl or gets a ring, he will owe it to this crew and a Bears organization that believes in him. Tank or no Tank, this team will continue to win games. They know what it takes. Tank should appreciate what he has here and make it the best of his future. He owes it to his teammates. You cannot put a price tag on that.

Looks Like Tarzan. Plays Like Jane.

2007-05-08T11:39:00.000-07:00

I am going to refrain from commenting on the Lance Briggs situation. He is dead to me. All of this money, agent, franchise player discussion confuses and scares me. I'm just a caveman. I will comment on the news out of Halas Hall that freshly drafted OLB Michael Okwo of Stanford "fits the Bears' OLB mold." How can they say this? Well, of course, he looked great at the rookie mini-camp held over this past weekend. Now there is a true and accurate test of a player. A newly-minted rookie plays touch football in his underwear with a bunch of other college players. Whoopee! I feel better about our defense already. I may be a loyal, spout the party line when it comes to fiscal responsibilty, Bears fan, but I am not blind. This whole situation sucks.

Here's why. When in doubt, let's go to the tape. This weekend, I watched two games from last year, the Bucs and the playoff game vs. Seattle. I watched our dearly departed OLB. When he wasn't making the tackle, he was always around the ball. He plays loose and explodes to the point of impact. He is football-fast and is good in pass coverage. In the Seattle game, he made the game-winning stop on Shaun Alexander. Enough said. He deserves his Pro Bowl recognition.

So, Jerry Angelo and Love Muffin, I don't want to hear about Michael Okwo's "measurables." You don't know if he fits the mold. You don't know if can play. The dead guy can play. The dead guy posed for the mold. Just let me mourn the loss. In fact, you should join me.

Season Ticket Bill Gets Paid so I can Return to Playoff Football.

2007-05-05T07:42:00.000-07:00

I paid for 2007 season tickets. The price rose a few bucks per ticket. That is what happens when you finally win a home playoff game after 15 years of sucking. Yet, I do enjoy the new Soldier Field. Great sight lines for football, clean, and more bathrooms. I do not miss leaving my seat 300 yards from the action and finding a port-a-potty with a 300-foot line of drunks. A trip always punctuated by my nameless partner (Kevin Golden) rocking the port-a-potty while I was inside. Beautiful Old Soldier Field. What a shithole.

If you get a chance, watch the next NBA playoff game hosted by the Golden State Warriors (Oakland). They have best crowd I have seen in years. They propelled their team to the biggest upset in NBA history. When was the last time a Chicago crowd made a difference? Some will say years ago when the Old Stadium was around. I will say the 2007 NFC championship game. That crowd was relentless. Normally, Bear fans are a fickle bunch. We are usually somewhat quiet, except when singing "Bear Down." Also, we can be negative in our response to adversity. See Rex Grossman.

But not that day. It was the biggest football game in this town since 1985. The fans did not disappoint. We put all our energy into every play. We were especially loud while the Saints were on offense. We did not need a Jumbotron or piped-in music to elevate our volume or tell us when to cheer. When Reggie Bush ripped us for a huge TD catch n' run, we did not give in to despair.

The result was that our Bears played their best 4th quarter of football in years in the biggest game of the season at the time. I was proud of that crowd and proud to be there. There was one Bear fan who was not. This guy that sat down our row threw up all over himself and a buddy...right before the opening kickoff! His buddy, the puked-upon, had to walk his wasted comrade out, and they never returned. That guy should have dumped his jerkoff, drunk buddy over the collonade and quickly returned to his seat. They missed a classic.

The Draft is over. Thank God.

2007-05-04T17:19:00.000-07:00

The NFL draft is out of control. For three months everyone talks about players who have not played one down of pro football. Speculation and unending prehash. Then, after the draft, they grade the teams selections. Say what?? That is comparable to a schoolteacher giving a grade on a test based on how the student held her pen and sat in her chair while taking the test. How about waiting until you actually can grade the performance. The rehash...equally exhausting.

I stopped reading the local papers coverage of the Bears. The columnists are spinning tall tales and creating controversy where there is none. The most recent example of this nonsense is the Greg Olsen rap video. Now Olsen has to apologize for doing something dumb but harmless as an 18 year-old college freshman. Olsen now joins millions of current and former 18 year-old college freshman in the stupid act department. What a story. These writers are talentless. David Halberstam is spinning in his grave. Dopes.

I love the Bears, but I will try to get it right. I will try to write well.