Matriculate the Ball Down the Field, Boys.

The late, great Hank Stram, offensive innovator par excellence, would have projectile vomited at the offensive display put on at Soldier Chase Bank Oscar Mayer Wiener Field this past Sunday. The Bear and Chief offenses suck lemons. With four minutes remaining and in possession of the football, with a chance to ice the game, The Bears O goes on a 25 second drive. The Bears defensive players are taking up a collection to sign one good offensive player. It is a disgrace. I want to poke a stick in my eye. Can't we keep the defense off the field for a couple of minutes in a row? I am getting stomach cramps just thinking about this.

If you love the Bears, then don't watch the Patriots. It will make you want to walk into oncoming traffic. They are Super-powered. The football in the AFC is really good. The Bears have to do something epic to even attempt to be competitive with the AFC's best. They have the D and the special teams. They also have, in my opinion, a full-fledged quarterback controversy. Better QB play gives us a chance at a Super Bowl. Otherwise, we are conceding that all we can get is a runner-up trophy, again.

I sold my tickets for $70 over face value. The girl that bought them got her money's worth. Devin Hester needs his own theater at Caesar's Palace. The man can put butts in the seats. He is awesome. I have seen him return three kicks for TDs in person. There is no more exhilarating player in the league. 10 seconds of pure adrenaline. Even if he doesn't break one, you hold your breath. He is the best returner that I have ever seen. Watch those potty breaks, you don't want to miss him.