I envy the baseball fan. Winter slips away, a new season approaches, and hope springs eternal. It is the right of every baseball fan to look forward to the arrival of pitchers and catchers. To dream of a World Series. To say, "This is our year."
I am not a baseball fan. I don't believe in fairy tales. I am a Bears fan. Summer kicks into the dog days, camp opens, and I feel like beating Lovie Smith. This is the birthright of every Bears fan. Especially, this preseason. What do I have to look forward to? An offense built out of cardboard and duct tape, while the Colts (season opening foe)drive a shiny, chrome Ferrari. I take that back, an offense built out of cardboard and scotch tape. Duct tape is strong, durable and dependable. Powerful. Comparing the Bears offense to duct tape is an insult to duct tape. Cardboard, too.
How bad is it? When your team is wringing it's hands due to the failure of their projected #1 receiver to report, when that receiver has never really played receiver since Pop Warner, well, that's bad. When your new 22 year old starting left tackle has to come off the practice field with a weak back (How long you had it? About a "week" back), that's bad. When that championship type defense's window is closing so fast that Clarista Flockhart finds it to be a tight squeeze, that's bad.
The Bears offense is going to be awful. The Horror.
See how I'm not like the baseball fan.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment