The ZUBAZ are dead. Long live the Zubaz. I have officially thrown away my Bears-themed Zubaz pants. You know the pants. Baggy, pajama material covered in blue and orange tiger stripes. Hideous, granted, yet essential to any football fanatics wardrobe, circa 1987.
Truthfully, this expunged pair was my second. My first pair were bought in the 1980's. I believe they were featured on an episode of VH1's "I Love the 80's." I wore them quite often. I did not throw out that pair; they just evaporated like most men's underwear. I enjoyed those Zubaz. They off- set my friend's Packer Zubaz, the green and yellow tiger stripes. Of course, I had no girlfriend or any dates with girls.
The second pair was purchased recently. New with tags on E-bay. When I reintroduced the style to Kathleen, she rolled her eyes. Not much of a reaction I'll admit, but she has known me for 16+ years. Appropriately, I was admonished not to be seen in those pants by anyone that she knew. The kids freaked out. They were not yet worn to the nub by my fashions. Now they understand the potential of true embarrassment. I only share the valuable lessons.
Nobody forced me to purge the pants. The Bears lost both games that I wore those goofy things. (At home, in front of the TV) I did not test the luck of the pants at a live game. I value sleeping under my own roof. The pants had to go because they were "losing" pants. If the outcome of those games had been different, they would have made it to Soldier Field. You would have seen other mentally ill men similarly attired. I would have fit right in.
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1 comment:
I'm pretty sure the super fans wore zubas while they ate sausage and praised Ditka. You're a superfan, right? It's only fitting that you'd have a few pairs of them for nostalgia.
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